Ladies, bust out your little black dresses and Kylie lipkits because semi-season is upon us! Along with the excitement of getting dressed up, doing your hair and makeup, and having an awesome night with your friends, you may need to do some serious searching for the ~perfect~ date. Here’s a compilation of the types of dates you are guaranteed to see at semi, as told by the cast of Friends, of course. Use this list wisely and you may be able to snag the best date of the night.
1. The One Who Doesn’t Come
Okay, I know this is kind of a bummer to start off with but it had to be said. There is always a girl who ends up alone on the dance floor or, even worse, stays home because their date, for lack of a better word, sucks.
2. The One Who Pukes and Gets Kicked Out
I understand you want to have fun at semi but if you allow yourself to get to the point where you vomit, you’re the worst. Chances are your date will get kicked out along with you and she did not spend hours gluing eyelashes to her face to impress the Uber driver on the way back to UConn. Trust me.
3. The One Who Hits on Other People
You know the one. They might think semi is a free-for-all for finding a hookup or even a new romantic interest, but they somehow manage to miss that the best girl they could possibly get is right in front of them. Really, I feel bad for this date.
4. The One You Can’t Find Anywhere
Oh, don’t mind me – just thought I asked you to semi so that we could, I don’t know, be together?? Dates that wander off are horrible because now we have to endure the questions:
- “Where does your date keep going?”
- “Why are you alone every time I see you?”
- “Did you even bring a date?”
- “Are you upset that your date keeps leaving you?”
5. The One That Will Not Leave Your Side
As bad as the date that keeps wandering away from you, is the one that clings to you, which may be worse. Semi-formals are social events and everybody wants to talk to ALL their friends. The worst part is when you ask them to give you some space and they say:
6. The One That Will Not Stop Telling Jokes
This date is always a show-stopper; whether in a positive or a negative way is the real question. Sometimes the comedian of the night is super helpful in easing everybody’s nerves and lightening the mood. In other instances, they are super annoying and everybody wants them to shut up. If you happen to have a jokester on your hands, hopefully he or she is more like the first kind.
7. The One That’s Over 21
There’s always that date that just recently turned 21 and wants to buy EVERYBODY drinks. They also may or may not act like they’re doing you the biggest favor of your life.
8. The Platonic Best Friend
The best friend you bring with absolutely no romantic intentions is quite possibly the second best kind of date. Both of you know that there’s nothing between you in any way and you can focus on looking bomb, going in at the buffet, and having a great night with your other friends.
9. The Best Friend You Thought Was Platonic
This date always sneaks up on us. You think that you’re gonna have a chill night with a friend and then it turns… wrong? Bad? Possibly amazing?! But maybe just awkward.
10. The Perfect Gentleman/Lady
The best for last! This date is everything you could ask for – arrives on time, dresses to match you, is social with your friends, pulls out your chair, is super attentive to you the whole night, takes snapchats with you so that you can get the dalmatian with the dog filter, the whole nine yards. But beware: these dates are a dime a dozen, much like the one and only, Chandler Bing.
I hope this exhaustive list helps you scrutinize your options and ask the absolute PERFECT date to semi this year. Keep your standards as high as your heels, ladies – good luck!