Heartbreak– it sucks! It is one thing that nobody wants to go through. Breakups are tough, so I will give you a few tips on how I healed after my long-term relationship separation and how you can also survive a breakup.
1. Remember the grass is greener on the other side.
Whether you and your partner broke up because of the toll of long distance in college or just because it was not working between you two- remember, the grass is greener on the other side. A wise friend once told me “Your ex is your ex for a reason.” Even though my ex-boyfriend and I broke up on good terms, I have learned that there are things I can do to help heal myself and see the brighter side of a bad situation. For instance, I have discovered a new sense of independence and learned that it is okay to rely on myself and not place all of my personal burdens on another person.
2. Find Distractions
Funny story- the day after my ex and I separated, I adopted two baby guppies, Tutti and Frutti. I did this because I wanted to channel my love into something else. I still had so much love to give, so I chose to share it with my new fish. I feel a special bond with these fish and will cherish them forever.
I also started using the “Journal” app on my iPhone. I mostly journaled whenever I had the urge to text him, or whenever I was feeling sad.
Another distraction that helped me tremendously was hanging out with my friends. They were very supportive throughout my healing journey and kept me up on my feet.
I have also been listening to a lot of new music but a song that really helped me is called, “A Little Bit Stronger” by Sara Evans.
3. Pick up new hobbies.
Hobbies are similar to distractions, they help take your mind off of the past and focus on yourself! Maybe if you haven’t been going to the gym, try going! It is a good way of working on your mind and body and it has been proven that exercising releases endorphins, which is the “feel good” chemical that your body creates.
You could try picking up a book that peaks your interest and give it a try. Better yet, try reading while being outside. Being outside can reduce stress levels and overall impact your mental health. I have recently finished a novel titled, “What You Are Looking For is in the Library” by Michiko Aoyama. I recommend reading this book if you want to hear heartwarming and uplifting short stories.
Just find things that make you happy and help keep your mind focused on yourself. Something that benefited me was stretching after I woke up. It is such a simple task, but it feels so good to do it for yourself. I suggest that whether you’re in a relationship or happily single, you should give it a try.
4. Reduce your screen time
Try to stay off social media. I recommend replacing Instagram with Pinterest. You can learn a lot about your fashion style and get inspiration for your aesthetic by scrolling on Pinterest rather than scrolling on Instagram (and it’ll keep you from stalking their account). Try replacing TikTok with a fun mobile game that you enjoy instead.
5. Try to avoid thinking of the “what-ifs”
Do not let the what-ifs haunt you. Of course, you should mourn the relationship but do not let the darkness encapsulate you fully. Get out of bed, do your makeup, make yourself feel pretty, and conquer the days! Surviving a breakup is hard, but it is doable. You must put effort into bettering yourself every day, even when you just want to rot in bed. It does get easier, and you get stronger.
Remember: the grass is greener on the other side.