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He Said, She Said: Episode 10

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Tufts chapter.

1.) Being intimate: how weird is too weird?

Summer Lovin: I would say I’m a pretty open individual but I draw the line at bondage, feet fetishes, choking, and other actions along those lines. Asking me to pretend to be like a cartoon character or something would also be a little uncomfortable for me- I like being me- one of my own personal characters, thanks. ;) It’s really all up to you though. Just remember to never do anything you don’t want to.

Snowdin: Everyone has (or should have) a crazy side. I have a personal rule that I will try anything once (with a few footnotes for personal well-being). There are some things that I definitely find strange, however, like balloon fetishes, but I guess everyone has his/her thing. Intimacy isn’t as fun without something a little daring, something that brings you out of your comfort zone. This can be fuzzy handcuffs, strawberries and chocolate fondue, or something too “creative” for a decent publication like Her Campus Tufts to publish online. Whatever you’re into, just make sure it’s okay with your partner. Don’t spring it on them in the middle of an intimate moment!

2.) Should you visit your significant other if they take a semester abroad?

Summer Lovin: This would be very dependent on my financial situation and where exactly they were studying abroad. In a perfect world I would definitely go; not only do you get to go visit your significant other, but you also get to visit an amazing place. It’s a win-win. If that is not within your means you can make it work without the visit, and you always have Skype!

Snowdin: This is a tough question, but my simple answer is yes! Being separated from your significant other for a semester or year can be extremely difficult. You’re each having very tough experiences and are no longer playing the same roles in each other’s lives. Visiting them not only gives you the opportunity to see someplace new, but you can then share in the experiences you’ve been seeing through them all semester. Traveling, discovering a new place, is absolutely incredible, and being able to do that with someone you can share it with is even better.

Reader-contributed question of the week…

3.) You’ve got a crush on a serial monogamist- a person who always has a long-term boyfriend/girlfriend. Is it a bad idea to date them?

Summer Lovin: I guess I would first wonder why this person is always in a relationship. It would a red flag to me. Does this person have a to have a person all the time? I know that when I end a relationship, I need break from everything before I decide my next move- it almost seems as though this person doesn’t really care (another red flag). It also seems a bit weird that an individual can never be alone. All that being said, when I want to be with someone, it’s just how it is. I would probably go for it and see what happens, which would probably end up being a mistake.

Snowdin: It should certainly make you think twice, but I don’t think it should be a deal breaker. As always, the context is incredibly important. If they bounce in and out of relationships frequently, that could be a bad sign. If someone tends to always be in a relationship, they may not be comfortable with themselves and may seek out companionship to fill those holes. That’s fine for a fling or a less emotionally intimate relationship, but if you’re looking for an emotionally meaningful relationship, you may want it to be with someone is comfortable enough with themselves to provide a decent balance. Everyone has flaws, so being someone who always seeks companionship is probably not the worst, just make sure it’s what you’re actually looking for.

Danielle Carbonneau is a senior at Tufts University double majoring in English and Spanish with a minor in Communications and Media Studies. She is very interested in advertising and has been the editor-in-chief of a creative writing publication on campus. Danielle loves chocolate chip pancakes, horror stories, and her family. She has a crush on HerCampus and all the amazing contributing writers.