Hey ladies! Listen up. We know the pressures that you experience upon arriving to college can be overhwleming…especially those involving sexual affairs. It might seem like you are constantly expected to act in a certain way: not only in the bedroom, but also in how you dress and communicate with a potential suitor. Read on to discover how you can maintain self-respect while being a sexually empowered college woman!
First and foremost, let’s talk about clothing. In order to feel comfortable in your own skin, you should feel confident about your outfit. You are the ultimate judge of what you should or should not wear. That being said, clothing choices can make for powerful first impressions. Be mindful that as much as it sucks, people who don’t know you may make assumptions based on appearance. Don’t feel pressured to dress in a “sexy” or “slutty” manner in order to impress someone, because it has the potential to draw unwanted attention. Having a positive self-image and loving your body is key to feeling sexually empowered.
Communication is another vital aspect for living a sexually empowered lifestyle. You must evaluate your personal values; know what will and will not make you feel uncomfortable. Don’t be afraid to speak up in a situation and share with your partner the things that are on your mind. It is important that you always practice safe sex. Remember that we are just in college, and one “oh-no-I-don’t-have-a-condom guy” can change the trajectory of your life. Ladies, bring a condom or other contraceptive method in your wallet in case you find yourself caught in a sticky situation (no pun intended). A conversation about STD’s, birth control, or abstinence could help avoid future issues. However, unfortunately most of the time we might feel ashamed to bring these things up with our partner. But, these conversations really shouldn’t have to be awkward. Be secure and assertive about your intentions, and your partner will not only have greater respect for you, but also will probably feel more confident sharing his or her own views as well.
In most situations, it’s not your lover who judges you the hardest. A lot of girls admit to feeling the most pressure from their friends – girl friends. Others can be ruthless and harsh about what you are or are not doing in the bedroom (which, you should note, usually comes from their own insecurities or jealousy). Keep this in mind if one of your pals is making you feel guilty or trying to pressure you into acting in a way that makes you uncomfortable. Also, remember there is no mandate stating that your sexual values, goals, and experiences should be shared or validated by others.
The bottom line is that when it comes to sexual empowerment, your choices should be made by you and not skewed by pressure from others. Be comfortable with, and confident in, your personal choices; you are in control of this aspect of your life, so own it. With all of these ideas in mind, please remember to have respect for other women, because we are all at different points in our “sexual” lives.