The first few weeks of college are filled with great expectations: no more nagging parents, new friends, intriguing classes, and everything else that college students profess to be the best parts of living on their own. But now, a few weeks in, you may find that you’re more homesick than you thought you’d be. Maybe you miss your family, your friends from high school, your (non-cinderblock) room at home, or maybe just the feeling of familiarity. Things aren’t clicking as quickly as you thought they would and it’s making you nervous. As a freshman who has experienced all of this, I can tell you that homesickness doesn’t go away immediately. I’d like to share with you a few tips to ease the longing for your favorite home-cooked meal so that you’re able to more easily adjust to your new home here at Tufts.
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Recognize That Homesickness is Normal
It may feel like you’re the only one in the world who misses home. I remember looking around at everyone around me, all of whom seemed to be having a great time. My worries were only exacerbated by the fear that I was the only one struggling; maybe you feel that way too. I can assure you that homesickness is completely normal as a first year college student and that lots of other students are going through the same thing. It wasn’t until a week into the semester that people on my floor began talking about missing home. Remember that everyone deals with things differently; just because one person doesn’t appear to be homesick doesn’t necessarily mean that they have completely adjusted. Leaving home and living on your own is a huge adjustment. Don’t be down on yourself for missing home and don’t assume that you’re the only one feeling this way.
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Don’t Compare Yourself to Others
Even more disheartening than homesickness at college is hearing from your high school friends about the amazing times they’re having at school. The first thing to remember is that every school, and every person, is different. So many variables make up our college experiences; each is so vastly distinctive from the others that there is no point in comparing them. Something else to remember is that although it may appear like your friends are having the times of their lives, they may be feeling homesick too!
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Try to Avoid Social Media
Yes, I know that it’s difficult in today’s technologically-centered world to go an hour without compulsively checking Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat; but really give it a try. Seeing friends’ pictures on Facebook will only encourage comparison and may ultimately make you feel worse, as explained in Tip #2. Again, remember that everyone wants to appear as though they’re having a great time even if they don’t truly feel that way.
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Get Busy!
Homesickness only increases the more you wallow in sadness. It’s time to take advantage of all the amazing things Tufts has to offer! Go for a walk around campus; join clubs that reflect your interests; take a trip to Davis or even to explore Boston! The possibilities are endless and the busier you are, the less you’ll think about home. Remember that it’s okay to do things by yourself!
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Stay Connected With Home, But Not Too Connected
Within the first few weeks, as you’re adjusting, it’s perfectly okay to call your parents regularly – once a day even – especially if it makes you feel better. But as time goes on, try calling home less often. Be aware that calling home may only reinforce the feelings of homesickness. Stay in touch, but not in constant touch.
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Get Help If You Need It
If you’re feeling really overwhelmed and stressed, there is no shame whatsoever in seeking outside help. Tufts has an amazing Counseling and Mental Health Service available to all students, and the staff is looking to help people adjust especially during the first few weeks. It may not be for everyone but don’t be afraid to use such a great resource if you need it.
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Remember That Nothing Happens Overnight!
You may not make your best friends the first day, week, or even month of school, and that’s totally okay! You aren’t going to feel completely adjusted the moment you arrive; managing coursework, clubs, friends, and adult responsibilities (i.e. laundry) is a lot to take on. Remember that Tufts will start to feel more like home the longer you’re here; don’t feel like everything has to be perfect right away.