Recently, the topic of discussion and main thing to look forward to is winter break. Most students are just trying to get by until then, desperately needing a break from the workload. You hear things like, “I can’t wait for break,” “I can’t wait to be home and see my family,” or “I miss all my friends from home”. For some however, break is not something to be glamorized. Many of us are excited to be in our own beds, hug our parents, and see friends from high school. For others, the word “home” doesn’t create the same fuzzy feeling. Going back home after being adjusted at school can be triggering. Putting yourself in a toxic environment puts your mental health at risk, but know you’re not alone and there’re some things you can do to combat that feeling.
After getting settled at college, life at home can seem foreign and weird. You may no longer be in touch with your high school friends, as you created a stronger bond with friends from college. Also, coming back to your life at your childhood home might be triggering to revisit. With that being said, know you’re not alone if the life you created for yourself at school is what you prefer, and going home brings up old emotions and memories. Moving and finding yourself is something to be celebrated, but break can be unavoidable.
Tips to combat toxic feelings at home:
- Making a toxic friend/parent journal
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Going home to what should be loving and isn’t can be very lonely. Being able to put your feelings and emotions into writing can be very powerful. Your journal can be your safe place and will allow you to be able to express yourself, when you feel as though the people around you aren’t listening to you.
- Reach out to trusted friends & family
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If you have at least one or two trusted friends or family members, keep them close during break. They are who know you and your situation the best. All they want for you is for you to feel loved, comfortable, and not alone. Human interaction is also important for mental health reasons. If you have no one in your hometown you can talk to in person, try to set up FaceTime calls with friends from school. This will allow you to vent and maybe get your mind off of negative emotions.
- Distance yourself and create a safe place
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Alone time and distance is crucial for your mental stability. If possible, get out of situations with toxic people and get to a safe place. Being alone will allow you to refresh your mind and negative thoughts you may be having. Make sure your relationship with yourself and your thoughts are healthy so you have control over the situation and feel safe. Don’t be too hard on yourself.
Going home over break isn’t appealing to everyone. Many can’t escape the toxic situations they find themselves in, but it’s important how you cope with it (if it is controllable). If you know going somewhere will make you feel uncomfortable and will trigger negative thoughts, if possible, don’t go there for the health of yourself. Keep your good friends close, and your life back at school will be waiting for you.
Be safe & you are loved!!