Like a hurricane, I breathlessly tore into the quiet, quaint Head House Bookstore at 7:06p.m., precisely six minutes late for the interview of a lifetime. I made eye contact with Ann; she, donned in a black and white midi skirt and fabulous stiletto booties, saw my armpit sweat stains and crazy eyes and gave a small smile. I blurted out something along the lines of, “I’m so sorry! My incompetent Uber driver decided to get ice cream for himself and drive the complete wrong way and wow I’m so sorry. And now I’m babbling. Did I mention I’m so sorry?” She laughed and said, “OMG! No problem, girlfriend. Pull up a chair and let’s chat.” Relieved, I did just that.
Ann Shoket, 44, is the former Editor-in-Chief of Seventeen magazine and the former executive editor of CosmoGIRL! magazine. She recently published her book, The Big Life: Embrace the Mess, Work Your Side Hustle, Find a Monumental Relationship, and Become the Badass Babe You Were Meant to Be. In the book, she guides millennial women in crafting a career that they love, because it’s not just about the money anymore. Shoket was the keynote speaker at Her Campus’s first ever Her Conference in 2012, and is close with the founders.
Shoket discussed the marked change that happened in young women once the recession hit. “[Prior to the recession], nobody worried so much about being successful…what was more important was having fun,” she said. “Fast forward; we had a terrible recession, and very suddenly, for an entire generation of women that were just about to come into their own, to go to college, to get jobs, they had the rug pulled out from underneath them. But rather than see their world get smaller, they got mobilized and became laser-focused on career ambitions and success.”
This change in attitudes among young women was Shoket’s spark of inspiration to write The Big Life. She was asked to give speeches about how to get started on your career at least a dozen times, which had never happened prior to the recession. She knew that when women entered their twenties and thirties, the stakes are even higher when it comes to developing a successful and fulfilling career.
“You don’t have a safety net, there’s nobody to guide you,” she said. “Your mentors feel remote and your friends are in the same slow-moving boat that you’re in, so how do you navigate this time in your life? And that’s where The Big Life comes in. When career and ambition and success are the center of your life, how do you put together the rest of the pieces of your life?”
The Big Life has sold thousands of copies and has motivated countless millennials to take charge of their life, which is exactly what Shoket intended. In the book, Shoket and other influential women like Michelle Phan, founder of Ipsy, and Jennifer Hyman, founder and CEO of Rent the Runway.
“I want to be clear about something,” she said. “This is not a book about having it all. It feels like such a dated idea; it’s old, it’s over. This is about crafting a life that you want; crafting work that feels meaningful, a relationship that feels like a partnership, and above all else, figuring out how to make yourself happy.”
As research for her book, Shoket hosted more than two dozen “Badass Babes” dinners, where she invited young women into her Manhattan apartment to talk about life’s tricky situations over frozen pizza and copious amounts of Rosé.
“We talked about the itchy emotions about being young and hungry and ambitious; you know, knowing that you have something so much more to offer the world, if only you could figure out how to get the world to let you.” she said.
Shoket found that some of the advice that she had brainstormed before these dinners fell by the wayside once she talked to these “badass babes”, a term she coined when she realized the power of millennial women.
“Those dinners were so deep, the conversations were so deep and so meaningful that it changed my advice and it changed the way I think about young women and their possibilities,” she said. “It went from me writing a ‘how-to’ book to writing a ‘me-too’ book.”
Shoket and I continued to discuss her book as guests began to file in for her book signing, but then we decided to switch gears and talk a bit about her career.
“One of the biggest challenges I’ve faced is one that I think you, and all other journalists will resonate with. It’s a challenge I think we all face, which is getting other people to see the world the way I do,” she said. “I always had such a clear vision for the way things should be and the way the world should work, and then I felt like it was my job to convince all the people around me to see the world the way I do, and to let me do things my way too.”
As you could imagine, visions of The Devil Wears Prada and Confessions of a Shopaholic were flashing in my brain, so I couldn’t help but ask, “Is being the Editor-in-Chief of a massive publication as glamorous as it seems?”
“Yes,” she said without any hesitation, “I had a beautiful office on the 17th floor of a glittering tower in the center of Manhattan with an amazing view of the Hudson River. I had a closet full of amazing shoes and I still do, thank you very much. It was part of my job to throw parties. I threw parties for Beyoncé, I met Taylor Swift and put her on her first magazine cover. Being the editor of Seventeen was a phenomenal piece of my dream.”
Throwing a party for Beyoncé; it’s casual. Meanwhile we’re over here saying that a party on Gratz was “so great” because we didn’t get beer spilled on us and didn’t hook up with our exes.
“The truth is, though, sitting here with you guys, with my book in your hands is a really, really amazing part of the dream,” she said. “I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”
I had time for one more question, so of course I had to ask for advice for women like you and me that are motivated to thriving in the journalism industry.
“I think you need to read great writers. Not just magazine journalists, not just digital journalists, like great journalism, great books. And just…just don’t give up.”
After our interview, Ann gave an hour-long talk about her book and answered the audience’s burning questions about defining our dreams and careers in this day and age. She is an incredible role model for any young woman looking to be successful. She has proven herself again and again. And through The Big Life, she is helping us prove that not all millennials are lazy and entitled. Thank you, Ann, for showing us your world and meeting us where we’re at in our lives.
So who wants to come to a Badass Babes dinner with me? I’ll provide the apartment, you provide the wine. And if we’re lucky, Ann will Skype in (not kidding)!