Check in on your friends who “decided” to rewatch BoJack Horseman.
We all have our films or shows that we constantly revisit. For me, it’s BoJack Horseman.
There are numerous reasons why I keep coming back, one of them including the character Diane Nguyen who I find myself relating to.
In Season 5, Episode 2 “Dog Days are Over,” Diane details her trip to Vietnam in her Girl Croosh article, “10 Reasons to Go to Vietnam.” The episode is an incredible representation of finding yourself after the loss of a relationship, and in my opinion, the perfect breakup guide.
Here are some reasons that resonated the most with me:
Reason #1: Reconnect With Your Roots
Diane’s first reason for going to Vietnam is to reconnect with her ancestral roots as a Vietnamese-American.
It’s important to try to reconnect with yourself after a breakup because you’ve not only lost a partner, but the person that you were when you were with them.
At the same, you cannot run away from your breakup or get on a plane and fly off overseas like Diane did.
I always try so hard to distract myself after going through a breakup, like taking on an insane workload and making destructive decisions. I don’t allow myself to experience the breakup, and it just makes the experience worse.
Reason #2: Have Fun With What You Can
Diane’s next reason for traveling to Vietnam is to be a tourist, it helped me realize it’s important to make the best out of your situation.
Losing a partner is a devastating experience, but now you’re single, you can have fun being alone without feeling lonely.
However, again, you can’t do this to the point where you’re just distracting yourself from the breakup.
Diane realized this when she received a phone call from Mr. Peanutbutter, checking in on her and letting her know that he’ll pick her up from the airport when she gets back, meaning she’ll have to return home to face the situation.
There have been times after breakups when I was too scared of returning home or being alone. If I was home alone, I had to face it. I had to feel all of the devastating emotions that came with a breakup, and I was scared of what I was going to do.
I’ve learned to have a balance of having fun and taking advantage of a new single life, while also actually dealing with being single.
Reason #3: You’re Single Now, So Your Ex Can Do Whatever They Want
Diane’s third reason is, “because you’re single now and you can do whatever you want.” However, she mainly focuses on whatever Mr. Peanutbutter is doing.
The amount of time I spent stalking my exes after breakups is appalling. I didn’t want them to be having fun if I wasn’t, but it was such an unhealthy mindset.
Reason #4: You Also Can Do Whatever You Want
Diane’s fourth reason for traveling is to meet new people. I’ve since realized best thing about realizing your ex can do whatever they want is that you can also do whatever you want.
Once a partner and I break up, we don’t owe each other anything; I’m allowed to keep going on with my life.
Reason #5: Use The Resources You Have To Cope
The idea of “Turning your work into a work-cation,” is Diane’s next reason.
What Diane does with her writings is something I frequently do; I write articles to make sense of my situation. My writing skills is a resource, and I use it to cope with different situations.
It’s important to discover what resources that you have to deal with it. For me, writing about the experience and ways to deal with it.
Reason #7: You Have to Face It
“Because you’ve got to leave and come back home.” This is how Diane ends her article, it means you can run away from your problems, try to distract yourself, but eventually you have to face it.
When Mr. Peanutbutter picks her up from the airport, he gives her the signed divorce papers and says he’s seeing someone else: the waitress from earlier in the episode. Diane tells him that she’s happy for him.
When I realized that I had to face everything that came with a breakup, it wasn’t easy, but I got through it.
I remind myself there’s a reason that relationship had to end. Despite how good it may have been, I would have been worse off staying in it.
BoJack Horseman is a remarkably relatable show, despite being a cartoon featuring talking animals who are also Hollywoo stars.
I cannot express enough how much this episode is a perfect description of a breakup, and guide to getting over it.