Thanksgiving is just around the corner, and you know what that means: Awkward family dinners.
When all your relatives – even the ones you haven’t seen since last year – gather together at the dinner table, there’s bound to be a fight. Here’s how it typically goes down:
1. The holiday starts with my relatives cooking Thanksgiving dinner in the kitchen. Then, in comes strolling the problematic relatives, i.e. the alcoholic aunt or the racist uncle.
2. I already know what’s coming, the fake-nice “hellos” and “how has college been?” Off to the living room I go.
3. My mom calls everyone to the dinner table. So, naturally, it’s time to pull up a seat next to my least-problematic cousin.
4. So far so good, everyone is eating, and nothing has gone wrong – yet. I can do this.
5. Oh no, is that my aunts fourth glass of wine? It’s only been half an hour. I’m not going to say anything just yet…
6. Now comes the political talk. A Trump-supporter-uncle is getting riled up and I’m losing my will to keep quiet.
7. That’s it. If I have to hear one more drunk rant about Obamacare I’m going to lose it. I’ll just go to the kitchen and get some water.
8. It seems like the political talk is cooling down when my Mom brings out the dessert. That lady is a blessing.
9. My now very drunk aunt starts to rant about millennials and that’s when I know it’s time to go.
10. I grab my plate of pecan pie and promptly move to the family room to watch Netflix with my cousins, undisturbed. My stomach and my mental capacity to listen to my family members are both completely full.
Despite the inevitable disasters, the best way to deal with awkward family dinners is to not deal with them. Just leave. I promise you will avoid 100% of the mess that happens. Enjoy your family dinner as much as you can and Happy Thanksgiving!