You know what my guy friends tell me all the time? “Girls are crazy.” This is, apparently, a fact universally accepted by anyone with a “Y” chromosome. Girls are shrieking, nagging Harpies who, roughly around puberty, completely lose all remnants of sanity and exist solely to frustrate the men around them. Am I right, guys?
I’m not going to completely disagree with this. As a woman with functional hormones and other female friends, I admit that we can sometimes lose our cool a bit when it comes to guys. Now, I could blame this entirely on men and the twisted things they do (and I’m pretty sure plenty of ladies would agree that this would be totally justified), but I think there is a bigger threat out there, one capable of turning a rational girl into a psychopath strait out of a WB dramedy.
I’m talking about technology.
Specifically, I’m talking about the use of Facebook and texting, and why I think the two of them are going to completely ruin human interaction, and with it, the world.
Am I paranoid? Maybe. But let’s look at the facts:
- Facebook makes getting jealous even easier
As much as we all hate to admit it, we get jealous. It can’t always be helped, but for the most part we can ignore the green-eyed monster and carry on with our business. Thanks to Facebook, however, we now have a network whose only purpose, it seems, is to notify us when our love interests are talking to other girls. We can see every new friend request and comment on his page, making it easy to jump to conclusions. “Can you believe that slut from art class ‘liked’ his status? He’s obviously cheating on me.”
Crazy? Absolutely. But I dare any collegiette to deny that she’s had a jealous spaz attack due to information found on Facebook. I personally have had a girl hate my guts because I once wrote on her ex-boyfriend’s wall. The nerve of me! I’ve been wearing a scarlet A on my chest ever since. Yes, this is taking things a little far, but I’m pretty sure with a little digging around we could all find at least one friend with a similar story.
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Texting is an entirely new language with its own set of social rules
I will go on record as saying that I think texting as a form of communication is incredibly frustrating. One ill-placed winky face can be the difference between clever and creepy, and I have no idea how many “aha’s” are too many. All that aside, though, the most nerve-wracking part of texting a guy is, without a doubt, how long to wait before texting back. Is responding right away too eager? Do I wait the same amount of time that he waited to reply to me? Do I wait longer? And please don’t get me started on the “who should text the other first” debate. Guys, when you text us, we are analyzing literally every aspect of your text message; if you don’t text back, there’s a good chance that we’ll assume you’ve suddenly decided that you hate us. Again, yes, this is certifiably nuts. But as a gender already accused of overanalyzing everything, texting only gives us more and more reasons to freak out.
- Technology is taking away the need for actual face-to-face interaction between the sexes
Remember those days when, if you liked a guy, you had to actually talk to him? And, if he wanted to ask you out, he had to actually look you in the eye and do it? Those days are long gone now. With middlemen like texting and Facebook, it’s possible to enter a relationship with a person through purely electronic means. Guys, I’m not asking that you show up on your riding lawnmower and whisk me off into the sunset (although that would be awesome); I’m simply asking for you to have the balls to not hit on me strictly via texting or Facebook comments, and then proceed to ignore me in person. Technology is not an excuse to eliminate good ol’ fashion courtship, gentlemen. And that’s why we’re going so crazy.