My Hometown and the Exit
Hi, my name is Melody; I’m 21 years old and a junior at the University of Tampa. Before moving to Tampa, I grew up in a small town in Upstate New York. My town offers very limited career opportunities and is filled with small-minded and provincial people. Two major components of the population are senior citizens well beyond retirement age and younger people who have little education and are stuck in dead-end jobs. The number of people living below the poverty level is below the national average. Many of my peers had never left New York State, and an equal number had never been to New York City even once. These are some of the reasons why I had an urge to move far away. When I committed to UTampa senior year of high school and shared that with people in the community, the types of reactions I received included:
“Wow, that’s so far away!” and “OMG, you’re going to Florida?”
Most people from my high school stay in our town, which is completely okay if that’s what they genuinely like. I’m not sure of the exact statistics, but if I had to guess, about a third of my graduating class (287 total, ⅓ being 95) went to college. About half of the 95 went to community college, and I’d say 15 students left New York State. Out of the ones who went out of state, most of them stayed in the Northeast. In my hometown friend group, only one of my friends is in college, and I’m the only one who went to college outside of the state.
So now you kind of get the picture. When you’re living in a place where everyone is stuck, working unfulfilling minimum wage jobs, not really seeing examples of successful people (I was personally lucky because of my two older brothers), it’s natural to become petrified at the thought of living 1300 mi from home. To be completely honest, when I first applied for college, I wasn’t sure if I could handle going to school that far from home. The majority of the schools I applied to were in the Northeast, and three of the colleges I applied to were in different regions of the country. But I had a vision, and deep down, I knew that I was going to attend UTampa. Even though it was a little scary, I knew that I would climb the hill and I would learn to absolutely love my life down there. And let me tell you, I don’t regret that decision a single bit. It’s probably the best decision I’ve ever made in my life. If I had stayed in New York or somewhere close to home, I would have been a lot less secure, less independent, and less happy because I would have never learned to overcome my hesitations.
Move-In
My mom and I drove from New York to Tampa in August of 2021. I moved into my dorm shortly thereafter. I had already met my roommate over the Summer, so we were familiar with each other. Right after we moved in, the two of us, plus our two suitemates, decided to attend a Week-of-Welcome event happening on campus. I was extremely nervous. Although facing a huge group of unfamiliar faces was nerve-wracking, I’d risk being at a considerable disadvantage if I decided not to put myself out there. Socializing was much easier than I had expected. Most conversations that I had started with the basic questions, “What’s your name?” “Where are you from?” and “What’s your major?” After the event, I found a few people that I really clicked with, so they came with my roommate and I to the back patio of my dorm building. While we were sitting outside, there were three guys who walked up to us, kindly introduced themselves, and let us know that they were trying to make new friends. From there, and throughout the week, we started adding more friends that each of us made into our group. The point is, no matter where you go, when you first move in, making friends will be a breeze because everyone else is also trying to make friends. My advice is to meet as many people and stay out of your dorm as much as you possibly can during the first three weeks of college. Exposing yourself to many faces will give you a social foundation, making it easier to establish professional connections and figure out which friends fall into which tiers of friendship.
The truth is, loneliness is the root of homesickness, so if you build a good support system for yourself, which you likely will because everyone wants to make friends, you won’t be homesick. Freshman year, for me, was like a movie. I had many friends, and I was always trying new restaurants, going to parties, going to beaches, and meeting all sorts of interesting people. I cried when I had to leave Tampa for the Summer after my freshman year.
How I’ve Changed
1. I learned how to become more independent
While I was in high school, I worked at Dunkin’ for a year before I left for college. I was fortunate enough that my parents paid my bills, so I saved almost 100% of what I made. I made so much money I didn’t need to work a job during my freshman year of college. I never had to ask my parents for money, and that holds true to this day. I had enough money to splurge on new restaurants, beach trips, and parties. Although I treated myself, I was also responsible. I didn’t blow my money on useless things. Everything I purchased had a purpose. Living on my own taught me how to properly budget and handle my money. I also picked up a few housekeeping skills like laundry and meal preparation, which will undoubtedly come in handy for the rest of my life. Living far away has helped me develop thicker skin since I had to become more self-reliant and make my own decisions.
2. My social skills improved tremendously
Before college, I was a socially anxious person. My high school was very cliquey, and because of that, I was hesitant to speak to certain people because I worried they would react negatively towards me or what I had to say. In college, you’re constantly interacting with new people, whether it’s in class, extracurriculars, or parties. It’s much easier to get through such activities and is much more enjoyable if you make friends in these scenarios. After repeatedly practicing interaction with new acquaintances and learning ways to make deep connections with people, I can now say that I’m a lot more confident speaking with people with whom I’m not too close. I’m also no longer afraid of going to large gatherings or parties. Socializing takes practice.
3. I’ve Been Given the Chance to Create New Experiences For Myself, and I Can Partake in These Activities Year-Round
Things I like to do for fun as a Florida College Student:
- Hammock near the Hillsborough River
- Tan/swim at the campus pool
- The beaches are about 30 min away
- Parties/Bars/Clubs
- Farmer’s Markets
- Hyde Park Village
- Go for walks on the Riverwalk and Bayshore
- Try new Restaurants
- Attend Concerts at the MIDFLORIDA Credit Union Amphitheatre
- Go on rides and try new foods and pet animals at the Florida State Fair
- Lightning Hockey Games
4. I found my Calling and Have Begun to Jumpstart my Career
In my opinion, making the huge decision of choosing a college major and deciding what you’re going to do for the rest of your life at 17/18 years old is way too early. Yes, some students may know from the beginning that they have one prominent passion, and that is the field they know they want to dive into. Other students may have multiple interests, and since the majority of the classes you take in high school are classes you’re obligated to take, like Science, Math, and English, you’re not really given a chance to explore your interests sufficiently. High school students don’t have as much life experience, so they may enter a career with a false idea of what it entails. In reality, the job duties/responsibilities could be completely different from what’s expected. They may also have a false sense of the circumstances they would enjoy or be tolerant of. For instance, a student may believe they can tolerate sitting at a desk for 8 hours a day, and once they start working, they may realize that they would much rather prefer a physical job. For this reason, I decided to enter college undecided for a semester before making a commitment. During this time, I took classes in my fields of interest. I fell in love with my digital art class, and that resulted in my choice of a graphic design major. Throughout my childhood and adolescence, I enjoyed drawing, but I knew nothing about graphic design. In digital arts, foundations drawing, painting, and other art/design courses, I saw tremendous growth in my skills, so I knew this decision was a good one.
After reading a book my brother recommended to me called Rich Dad, Poor Dad, I started taking business classes in my sophomore year of college, which led me to declare a minor in marketing. While taking BUS101, I made a really good connection with my professor. I told her that I make digital illustration portraits and that I’ve done a few commissions in the past and wanted to continue. She encouraged me to do so and also informed me about the Accelerator Program. During the same semester, I joined the Entrepreneurship club, and one day, while I was in the Center, these two guys overheard my friend and I discussing the RA job positions. Since one of them was an RA, he kindly joined the conversation. Little did I know, he wound up being my supervisor for my first internship, and the other guy became one of my first clients for my portrait business. The University of Tampa is in the heart of downtown, so there are endless networking and career opportunities. In the spring of my junior year, I decided that I wanted to focus more of my energy on developing my portrait business, so I finally joined the Accelerator Program. Following the decision to choose UTampa for college was the second-best decision I’ve made. I’ve learned plenty about business strategy from mentors of expertise, I’ve connected with many like-minded students, I participated in my first pitch competition, and I also exhibited my work at the 2024 Synapse Summit, where I generated 30 leads and now currently have 2 clients I’m creating for. It’s never a bad idea to continually meet people because you never know what opportunities could follow. It was a series of events that led me to join the accelerator program and the amazing opportunities it offers. None of this would’ve happened if I never read Rich Dad, Poor Dad. Here’s the takeaway: when you’re moving through the world, remain open-minded.
Final Message to You
If you’re considering going to school in Florida or in another state outside of your own, and it’s doable for you, I highly recommend it. The place you choose will at first feel strange, but it will eventually become your second home. You will become the person you never thought you could be, and you’ll make achievements professionally and personally that your younger self will be proud of. If you take nothing else from this article, take this:
“You must take action outside of your comfort zone to expand your comfort zone.”