Dating in your 20s is hard. There’s a lot going on during these times. A lot of us are in school, working, or dealing with personal issues. It feels like a scary thing to get into, especially if you had a bad experience with dating before. So, when you meet someone who makes you feel those butterflies, it can freak you out, but it can also reset you.
I was in a bad relationship when I was 18 years old. It was my first relationship and I thought it was healthy. I was too naive to really know what I was doing to myself. I finally decided to break it off after two years and do my own thing. I met guys, some who were just blow-offs, some who just wanted hookups *rolls eyes*, or someone that could’ve been, but it wasn’t meant to be. I was transferring to another college to finish my BFA and decided I only wanted to focus on school and myself. I didn’t care to meet anyone. I was over the whole dating scene. I was on my own path and that was not going to involve a man.
Then, halfway through my senior year, it just happened. I met someone and we instantly clicked. We had a class the following semester and mutual friends but never talked until we were doing a project together. I felt like I could just be myself around this person and it felt right. He made me laugh, made me feel beautiful, and encouraged me. I definitely felt like I was in a Taylor Swift song. Unfortunately, we broke it off because the timing wasn’t right and we were both on different paths in our life. Luckily, it was a mutual decision and we were able to remain friends since we value our friendship more than anything.
Like I said, dating is hard. Period. We all know that to some degree. I know personally, I have had a reset on how I feel about dating. I now have a more positive stance on it. I’ve learned how I should feel in a healthy relationship. I know now never to settle for less and to feel beautiful. Also, not to feel bad about focusing on me, my mental health, or my studies. The most important relationship is the one with yourself.
*cue Good Days by SZA*