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Being Single Does Not Equal Loneliness 

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Tampa chapter.

Dating, hooking up, situationships, and dating apps are topics that are commonly talked about between friends and society. Yet, I hear fewer people talk about being single and just enjoying it. People tend to think that being single is the same as being lonely or depressing. This is not true at all! Being single is not rotting in misery about not having a relationship, but actually about just developing a more in-depth relationship with yourself, and I would also include your friends and family.

Being single is a learning process; some might call it having “high expectations,” but when you do not have a relationship, you learn more about yourself, in my opinion. You spend time learning what things you like and what you don’t; for example, I have learned that I like staying in on a Friday night and having a good dinner, dessert, and a TV show instead of going out and partying. I also learned that in a relationship, I am looking for someone who supports me in my life and goals and respects me, knowing that I will do the same thing for them. I hate when people ask me if I have a boyfriend. I say no, and they proceed to tell me directly or indirectly that they feel sorry for me. Being single is not a problem I have and that I have to fix, and having a relationship won’t make my life better. I understand that having a good, supporting relationship makes you happy, but having it does not mean every problem in your life disappears. 

If you go into the internet and type in your search for “being single,” a mixture of articles/ websites says how being single is the best decision to make, how to be OK with being single, and how to feel better about being single. After these, the myths come up, such as:

  1. Single people are lonely.
  2. Single people fear intimacy.
  3. They have high expectations.
  4. Being single = failure. 
  5. Single people are broken or dysfunctional.
  6. Single people are workaholics. 

These are some of the myths that you can see on the internet, which are not true and honestly hilarious. This is not to say that a person can’t feel lonely when single, but sometimes that feeling is not unique because they are single. Being single does not mean you are a lonely, depressed person or that you are having the time of your life; it just means you are human, and in that moment of your life, you are traveling with yourself and learning. I have been more single than the times I had a relationship in my life, not just because I have too high expectations (according to my family)  but because in this part of my life, I feel like I don’t have the time to put into a relationship. I am always working multiple jobs and studying, so when I have free time, I just want to relax in my home. Society likes to make single people feel embarrassed about being single, but I say, “Screw that!”. If you want to have a relationship go have one, but if you want to be single, be single and enjoy it. Don’t let anyone tell you how to feel about being single. Enjoy your season of singleness every day, take yourself on a date, do things you love, try something new, whatever you want, but don’t feel sorry because others around you are in a relationship and you aren’t.

Anngelyk M. La Luz Maldonado is a writer at Her Campus at Tampa Chapter. As a Her Campus writer, her articles cover topics revolving life experiences and entertainment. Aside from Her Campus, Anngelyk is a senior at the University of Tampa majoring in Marine Science/Biology with a minor in Environmental Science. She works for the Department of Biology as a head mentor for the general biology (199L) lab and an office assistant. Anngelyk, also, is a researcher at the Durkin Lab working to gain better understanding of Macrocheles sp. mites. When not writing or studying, Anngelyk enjoys watching Asian dramas, listening to music, and reading. She likes to read books about high-fantasy, mystery solving, and lately she is into romance books such as “Love, Theoretically” by Ali Hazelwood. She also enjoys spending time with her friends and calling her family.