On Friday, the world (literally, the world) was abuzz over photos of Kate Middleton, duchess of Cambridge, sunbathing topless while on holiday in Provence. Since then the royal scandal has graced the headlines of many, if not most tabloids. Papers in France, Ireland and Italy have published the photos incensing the House of Windsor and necessitating a reading of any and all privacy laws across Europe.
As royal reps demand that France’s Closer hand over the files of pictures that they currently possess, the duchess and Prince William are touring the South Seas, dancing festively in Tuvalu and “smiling through scandal.”
Since their April 2011 wedding, Kate and William have dazzled the world with glamour and prestige but at what cost? Kate’s every action is scrutinized and believed to be a sign of pregnancy, her womb quickly becoming the world’s most valuable real estate. Recently, she rejected a glass of wine, which would mean, by contemporary tabloid standards, that she is most certainly with child. Without confirmation from the higher-ups at Buckingham, Kate is not pregnant and therefore must be sterile because that is, most definitely, the only other viable option.
In the wake of this latest cause célèbre, Kate, William and the royal family at large are a communal punch line and commercial cover story. What is it, I wonder, about the topless photos that really have heads turning? Is it the fact that Kate is normally so conservative and, you know, clothed? Is it that consumers are so desperate to get their hands on photos of naked royals? Or do we just feed so vacuously off the notion of scandal? Sarah Ferguson, former Duchess of York, obviously had something to say this week. She was, after all, also photographed topless in 1992 back when she was a royal (note to all royalty, just keep your tops on). Fergie voiced her sympathy for the Duchess and called the invasion of privacy “deplorable, abhorrent and despicable.” I’m guessing she might have said something similar over her non-invite to Kate and Will’s wedding…
Media outlets worldwide seem to be suffering from a non-curable case of Anglophobia. The royal couple’s every trip, movement, outfit becomes fodder for another article, blog post, headline. Most commentators would cite Princess Diana’s years as a royal and even her death as evidence of sadistic media frenzy. Princess Diana died several years before the advent of social media and, in turn, the birth of instant news. It may prove harder being a Princess in the digital age where a single tweet can set off a firestorm of press coverage. Yet in typical hypocritical fashion, I’d be totally willing to try it out so Harry if you’re reading this, hit me up.
Christopher Mesnooh, an American lawyer in Paris, has recently been interviewed in regards to France’s privacy rights. Mesnooh explained to UK’s The Telegraph that in this case “the horse got out of the barn a long time ago.” The steeplechase continues, however, and more headlines over the legal proceedings and fallout from the topless photos scandal will certainly find their way to the front page. That is, until the next noteworthy royal event occurs. With all this unwanted attention 24/7, I would not be surprised if Kate were to throw off, I mean throw in, the towel.