True Life: My Complex Vagina

In a society where women are sexualized at almost every turn, a series of skits and monologues about empowering women to love their vaginas might seem crazy. Nonetheless, this past week, Miss Spelman, Daeja Langston, and Her Court put on the True Life: My Complex Vagina, an Ode to the International Vagina Monologues. This series of skits and monologues were actually crazy good, and the entire event was definitely an emboldening experience.

 How many of us really look at our vaginas every day? Who, at times, is even uncomfortable saying the word “vagina”? If you answered no to the first question and “yes” to the second, you are not alone sis! As women, we are never really taught to love our vaginas or to think that they are some magical being, when in reality, they are.

If you really stop and think about it, society has so many different outlooks about what the “perfect vagina” may look like.  Often times, different opinions are presented with what it should be...but the thing is, that is ALL they are and Spelman’s production of the My Complex Vagina reminded me of just that.

While all the skits and monologues were amazing, a couple truly stood out:  

1. Hair Down There

I don’t know where the perception that vaginas are supposed to be hairless comes from, but, unfortunately, women have been conditioned to think that a "pretty vagina" equates to a hairless vagina. Making that vagina hairless can be expensive, so why should we have to worry about that? This was the central concept of Hair Down There : it is YOUR choice what YOU do with YOUR vagina. Who cares what men think? At the end of the day, if whoever you choose to have relations with decides they don’t want to because of how you chose to keep your body hair, are they really the person for you? NO. s

2. My Battery Operated Boyfriend

For me, this skit explored a very personal, sensitive topic. Luckily, watching a whole skit made talking about it much easier. The Spelmanite in this skit was trying to explain to her real-life boyfriend just how B.O.B (battery operated boyfriend) benefited the both of them; her and her “friend” down there got some much needed alone time when her real boyfriend wasn’t around and in reality, that was really helping their relationship! Sometimes, you have to do what you have to do and be unapologetic about it and if a vibrator helps you get that done, more power to the  B.O.B.s out there!

3. Losing My Virginity

“I lost my virginity.” The spoken word on this topic was literally mind blowing. Have you ever realized how terrible that sentence actually is? When you lose something, like say a set of keys, you drive yourself crazy looking for it and feel like a dummy for doing so. So why would we associate a feeling of loss, getting mad/upset at yourself, with something like virginity? If you are no longer a virgin and that was of your own making and choice, you should know that you did not lose your virginity; you know exactly what you did with it. At a certain time and a certain place, you said to yourself, “I am ready,” and let it go. The language associated with losing something makes it seem like we’re mindless or ignorant and can’t keep track, that we inadvertently failed to retain something, or that we’re missing a vital and working piece of ourselves for the rest of our lives…have you ever thought about that?

4. Uninvited & Loss

While a majority of the acts were playful in nature, these two scenes were serious monologues about the issues of rape and unwanted lust. Uninvited was an incredibly moving piece, speaking from a victim of rape’s point of view.  A portion of the poem is here below:

“my body is not yours for the taking

unless I warrant you the to go pass

unless I warrant you with soft kisses back

my hands and tongue intertwined to yours with passion

unless I say YES.

1 syllable. YES

1 syllable. NO

when NO means NO why don’t you go?”

This show also decided to include a monologue not just on vaginas and sex, but also human trafficking and that’s what Loss was about. A line that really stood out was, “We put greater value in the soles of a shoe than the soul of a person.” While most of us don’t think about the origins of the things that we buy, the fact that there is a high probability that our Nike sneakers were made in a sweatshop by underage kids and that if we knew we wouldn’t support…the unfortunate fact of the matter is that we deem ourselves helpless when it comes to the items we consume. Maybe we should consider who is really helpless in the matter: us or the child worker making what we buy?

Overall, the theme of My Complex Vagina was to make the audience realize that vaginas are important and should be deemed and treated as such. Your vagina is your property and yours alone, don’t you ever forget that. Your vagina is worthy of your love and attention as well as the respect of others. We should never compromise or think otherwise!