Society has this fun little way of making women think that we are all in competition with one another and we are all losing. Someone else is always prettier, smarter, funnier. I mean, we have become so fixated on our looks that we have even started scrutinizing each other’s eyebrows. Well girl, let me tell you. None of that stuff matters in the slightest.
Comparing yourself to other women will not change how you look. Spending hundreds of dollars on makeup or hours of your time on your outfit will not make you happier. Constantly thinking about how others perceive you will not make them like you. It’s all very simple. We didn’t choose to be who we are, and we can’t change that, no matter how unfair it is that the girl at the pool was gifted with supermodel legs while you’re huddled up in a beach towel like it’s the middle of winter.
So, how do we accept the fact that we are all uniquely beautiful? How can we feel like our most beautiful selves without breaking the bank or crying out in frustration?
This is where women, like my girl Kate McKinnon, come in
For some context, I started watching Saturday Night Live a few years ago. And, as funny as it sounds, it changed my life. Here’s why.
Growing up as an awkward kid in a little unknown township on the coast of New Jersey, I always saw myself as the goblin of my friend group. Sounds harsh, right? It really was, but that’s really how I saw myself.
Every one of my friends was tall, thin, tan, and athletic. I was of average height, a little chubby, pale as a ghost, and had been binge watching too many episodes of iCarly to remember what the sun looked like. I felt too different and I felt like I would never be beautiful since I didn’t look like them.
If this sounds like you, I have some advice.
First off, you’re not a goblin. You are a beautiful human.
Secondly, you are being way, way too hard on yourself.
The secret to being beautiful and accepting who you are isn’t about yearning to obtain what you don’t already have. It’s taking what you do have and owning it, girl.
After I started watching those women on live TV night after night between fits of laughter, I felt like I had been let in on this secret. I could feel the comedic energy coming through the screen and into my living room every Saturday night, every comedian unique, staying true to their unique form of humor. The confidence and shamelessness inspires me to this day.
True beauty has nothing to do with makeup or expensive clothes. The secret to beauty is just being your authentic self.
It’s all about owning your personality. The way you do things is unique to you and it’s so special and amazing and beautiful. It’s all about you being shamelessly and unforgivably yourself.
Every single person on this Earth has flaws and we are all hyper aware of them. Stop worrying about yours. Chances are no one else sees them. And outside appearances don’t matter half as much as what’s on the inside.
And don’t even pay attention to the live audience watching you as you do you. You will begin to stumble the minute you start thinking things like, but who do they want me to be? It’s not about them. The most beautiful you will ever be is when you are smiling, laughing, and just doing whatever it is that you want.
The bottom line is this-you shouldn’t see beauty as something you have to work for to have. Being beautiful is all about being your natural self-confident, happy, and free. That’s it. And now when I think about beauty, I think Kate McKinnon talking about an alien abduction while man spreading on live television. Hilarious, memorable, and beautiful.