Let me start out by saying I know I’m not perfect. There’s a lot of people in my life that have helped me see that everyone has flaws, and everyone makes mistakes. It’s inevitable and there’s no possible way anyone can be perfect and not make mistakes or do things they regret. When I was younger I learned a lot about making the same mistake twice. I was a bit of a stubborn child and I would constantly make the same little mistakes over and over again, and I seemingly never learned from them. When I was little they were small mistakes. As I grew older they didn’t necessarily get bigger, but they took a toll on me more emotionally than anything else. I’d like to think that my mistakes never changed my life or the people around me, but they changed the inner me quite a bit. My actions were never truly detrimental to my outside world, but my inside world has struggled a lot. I guess I never realized until a few years ago that my mistakes were going to affect me a lot whether I wanted them to or not.
I take everything pretty seriously, even in certain situations with certain people where I know everything is just meant to be fun and games. People have been telling me all my life that I can’t take things personally and I’m just starting to figure out how to do that. A year of therapy has taught me that you can only fix that which is within you. It’s a good thing for me to remember whenever I get into the wrong head space and begin thinking everything is my fault. I used to do that a lot but thanks to recent events, I now see that it is a huge waste of one’s time. It’s not worth it to replay everything in your head. What you would have done differently, what you could have said, etc. It’s really important not to live in the past. I’m still learning how to do that, but I know I’ll get there eventually.
At the end of the day, we all make mistakes and sometimes we probably regret them. It’s hard for some people to not overthink their past and how everything could have been different, but I have gotten to a point in my life where I know that thought process won’t get me anywhere. You can overthink your past and your mistakes all you want, but it’s best to realize sooner rather than later that this will only hurt you in the end. I wouldn’t be where I am today if I didn’t distance myself from certain people and allow myself time to heal. If you’re struggling with mistakes you made, the best I can say is that the past is in the past, and time really does heal all wounds.
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