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Long Distance Relationships: Tips From People Who Have Been There

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SMCVT chapter.

If I were to guess, I would say that 70% of all college students are in or have been in a long distance relationship. And it can be really hard sometimes, especially if it is new territory for you and your partner.

Me personally, I am doing long distance with my partner currently, and I’ve found it interesting the things we do to keep our relationship fresh and fun.

But rather than just looking to myself for tips, I turned to Instagram and got some fantastic and heartfelt responses from people who are in the long-distance right now, or have been before!

For the first question I asked, I decided to get a broad scope of how far away certain couples were, as well as how long they were together. The least amount of time a person answered was a year, and the most was four years.

For the most part, people were around 3 hours apart. But for some they were oceans apart, or states.

The second question I asked was what made these couples relationships strong. And the responses were varied yet similar.

Communication was the number one response. Call when you can, have scheduled times if possible, and facetime helps too. Making sure you see or hear the other person can help bridge that gap that can feel really wide at times.

Another aspect of communication is to always be truthful and clear if something is bothering you. It’s a lot harder to tell if a person is upset at you via technology, which is why its important to be genuine and tell the truth. It’ll lead to less fights and a stronger relationship in the long run.

The last part of communication was the little things. Ask the other person about their day, the highs, the lows, the little things that you missed out on.

It’s hard to be far apart from somebody you love, and regular communication can help a lot.

Finally, I asked what were the best and worst things about long distance.

The best part about long distance is that you have time to miss your partner. When I see my boyfriend after months of not seeing him, all the time I spend with him is full of love.

Another thing is that you get to be independent and grow separately from your partner. You are growing in your school, your career, your other relationships, but at the same time you are growing with your partner at the same time. It’s a really special thing to witness, especially if you have been together for a long time.

And finally… what are the worst things about long distance?

For many people, the lack of physical contact is the worst. No hugs, no kissing, no sex. For others even a lack of quality time. My boyfriend struggles with long distance because his love language is quality time. Its hard for him to see Skype calls as quality time if I’m not right next to him.

Another thing is the lack of spontaneity. A lot of times in long distance things have to be planned, and that can really suck when you aren’t that kind of person.

But for the most part, long distance is manageable! There are lows, but I live for those moments when I get to see my boyfriend again after a while. And I know he’s always a phone call away.

Just know that if you are in a long-distance relationship, you aren’t the only one.

Aurora is a freshman at Saint Michaels College. She is majoring in Journalism with a minor in Gender Studies. She loves reading, the color pink, and her cat.