10…
9…
8…
The chanting is getting louder and more in unison at this point.
7…
6…
5…
4…
The anticipation is peaking….
3…
2…
1…
finally with every breath inside of you,
Happy New Year!
Confetti bursts, kisses are exchanged, glasses are clinked and still, it feels as though nothing has changed. All of this dressing up, extra money being thrown around, all for one not-so-crazy and predictable evening that has become embedded in American culture: New Year’s Eve. It is one big marketing ploy to get people to romanticize their new lives as the clock strikes midnight. To be frank, it’s not about where you are when the grandest, most extravagant ten-second countdown of the year begins, it’s about who you’re spending it with. Despite the many people that could be attending the overly-crowded and overly-hyped celebration, when it comes down to it, what matters is that the people you cherish the most are right there with you. The people that you exit one year with and enter into a new one with—that is a right of passage to true friendship. And if you’re really lucky, and I mean really lucky, you’ll be able to celebrate this right of passage multiple times in a lifetime. The love that is exchanged on New Year’s is an enchanting, never-want-to-grow-up type of love. It is the one day of the year where everyone seems to be dressed up in the hope of what is to come. It seems as though New Year’s Eve radiates the essence of, “Pinch me, I’m dreaming.”
With all of the passion for the idea of what could be, many Americans channel their hope into the new year by making New Year’s resolutions. This tradition of bettering yourself at the mark of the new year has been around for many years. And by many, I mean since the Babylonians, some 4,000 years ago. It’s honestly kind of comical—people complain nowadays about the big hoorah of New Year’s Eve, but when it comes down to it, it is just one day. That’s all. And then we move on. But back in the glory days of the Babylonians, they used to party hard. 12 days in a row hard. I think we can all relax about our one evening of festivities when it used to be almost a two-week ordeal. Historically, the idea of resolutions came complimentary with the installment of a new king. The citizens wanted to better themselves and, as we might say nowadays, show off for the new king. They would pay off all of their remaining debt, return any items they had borrowed from their neighbors and take extra good care of their crops. Not too ambitious, right?
One might be thinking, “Who would even benefit from a New Year’s resolution anymore? Those are so ten years ago.” In a word, you. I’ve found that it’s hard to pick just one resolution because there are so many things to work on. Cook more meals at home. Clean every day. Eat healthy every day of the week. Go to the gym more. Call old friends to catch up on life. Learn to play the guitar. Play chess more frequently. Save more money. Stay off social media. Stop buying fast fashion. Become more organized. Learn to be happy by myself for myself. The list goes on and on. One could say that New Year’s resolutions appear to be daunting and overwhelming at the very least. It brings to light something that I find very interesting, and that is the difference between exotelic and autotelic activities.
Exotelic activities are those that are directed to a mean’s end or toward a specific goal. For example, college students are taking a specific class to pass, which allows them to aid in the path towards their desired degree. Autotelic activities, on the other hand, are done for the sake of doing. For example, when you come home on Friday to your roommates after you get a good grade on anexam, and you dance around in celebration of your hard work. You dance for the sake of dancing. You aren’t dancing with your roommates in order to achieve a higher purpose. In that moment, you capture the essence of simply being.
And now, what if we took that idea, the beauty that intrinsically comes with autotelic activities and applied it to our New Year’s resolutions? What if we accomplished our goals for the sake of doing them rather than as a means to an end? What if we chose to exercise more for the sake of doing so, rather than for a higher goal of trying to lose weight or look a certain way. What if we did these things, simply because? What if we called up an old friend to talk just because? For the sole purpose of listening, of being.
Well, if you’re just reading this article to a mean’s end (or because I forced you to—thanks, Mom!), you can stop now. I hope you are reading this article for the sake of reading it. It’s imperative that as we enter into the rest of this new year, you are not creating a “new you.” I hope that you are nurturing the current version of yourself. Remember not to put too much pressure on yourself, and to make resolutions for the sake of doing them, not as the means to an end. Maybe, just maybe, we don’t have to make resolutions for a specific purpose. Maybe the purpose in our resolutions is to just experience being.