There was a point in my life when I would feel embarrassed for not being able to have my life together—or regret that I didn’t finish my education on time—because I constantly changed my major until I found my happiness. I come from a very strict Indian household where expectations must be met. My parents are high school graduates, but further education was not in the books for them. Being a first-generation college student and a daughter, I have many expectations from my parents.
Starting college fresh out of high school was very nerve-wracking. I declared my major as biology on the premedical track like many of my peers did. I did not know what I wanted to do with my life, so I followed in my peers’ footsteps and thought it was the right move. Sophomore year rolled around, and I was taking the dreaded organic chemistry class. I immediately knew the medical track was not going to work out for me.
Without doing any research on what nursing school was going to be like, I blindly and immediately changed my major to nursing. I was young and naive, with no knowledge of the path I was taking; I thought it would be easier than medical school. But once I started nursing school, I immediately regretted my decision. I just didn’t feel like it was the place for me.
After the whole major-switching debacle, I thoroughly did my research for X-ray school, shadowed some X-ray techs and applied to my local community college. I was really nervous and scared to start X-ray school because I had no other options—this was my last straw. Despite long, late-night study sessions and early clinical hours, I graduated top in my class and passed my boards. I felt very accomplished and proud of myself. I finally found something that I enjoy, and never have to think twice about my decisions. During my program, I decided to further my education in radiation therapy.
When I first made the decision to switch my major from premed, my parents were very disappointed in me. I thought when I told them that they would be supportive of my decision; however, I was completely wrong. I have many cousins and family friends who are on the premedical track or in medical school, so my parents had high hopes that their daughter would one day become a doctor…but I know the decisions I make for myself fall upon me. With the path I’ll be going on, I’ll be financially stable and extensively happy. I constantly compare myself to my friends who are either in medical school or working as nurses. Some of them are getting married or having kids. When I’m hanging out with them, though, they don’t seem satisfied or happy. They are always complaining about the workload, and it almost seems like they are in it for the money and not happiness.
At times, I feel like I’m the black sheep of the family, but then I remember that I have found my niche and absolutely love what I’m doing. I am 10 times happier than I would have been if I had stuck it through medical school or nursing school. I constantly think back to conversations with my friends who “have their lives together” and think about how lucky I am to be at a stage in life where I’ve never regretted my decisions. I’m proud of myself for being a boss woman.
If you’re at a stage where you’re unhappy, unsatisfied and constantly questioning your life choices, know it’s totally normal to do that—you’re still figuring yourself out. It’s totally okay to change majors, it’s okay to be imperfect, it’s okay to not know what you’re doing. If you’re feeling like you haven’t done anything, reflect back to a point in your life where you accomplished something that you’re most proud of. Thinking about things I’ve accomplished in my life helps me realize that I’ve actually won in life.
As long as you can say that you’re working towards happiness and satisfaction, in my eyes, you’ve made it.