Philadelphia is an icon of Independence. Home to the Liberty Bell, Independence Hall, the Constitution Center, the Besty Ross house and Franklin Court, the city’s history and modern presence is intertwined with the foundation of the United States. In honor of our founding fathers, we’re calling on some of the most independent college women this side of the Ben Franklin bridge to leave their comfort zones and establish themselves in the city that established our freedom. This weeks articles feature a few ways to bring out the best possible you from school, to work, to style.
When you were a freshman at SJU it may have seemed like everyone already knew each other in this tri state area, especially if your roommate or suite mates went to Bishop Shannahan. Therefore, a provincial experience may have daunted you the first couple months. If you’re a junior or senior reading this, don’t back out now because this article is for all of you girls. Today we talk about, that’s right as the famous Kelly Clarkson would sing it, Miss Independent. Independence in our collegiate sense has a couple of different meanings, but our list of ideas below should apply to everyone. I’m challenging you girls to think about your position at SJU right now. A couple questions to keep in mind while reading are, Are you still dependent on high school friends? Do you feel you’ve given it all you got? Are looking to branch out more this year? Are you the happiest you can be? What are you really looking to do this year? Do you have certain goals set? As you go through our articles for the 4th of July, try some of our advice. We are at college for a reason ladies, no dependent M.R.S. Degrees here unless you’re planning on marrying Ryan Gosling. Then stop reading. This weeks news article features two incredible hawk women, Emily Reineberg and Claire Tedesco. We’ve got their full story so don’t stop now!
Emily Reineberg, ’14, embraces the liberating atmosphere on Hawk Hill by utilizing it to set herself up for a successful future, while maintaining an internship, extra curricular activities, honors classes, volunteer work, friends and romance. This past year, the International Relations major and double minor in Asian Studies and Chinese, ventured to Asia to study abroad in Bejing, China without knowing a single student taking the same journey. Emily’s hectic schedule leaves us wondering how she not only stays afloat in the sea of schoolwork and deadlines but how she manages to exude confidence and branch out on her own without being weighed down by constant demands. So….how does she maintain her independence a part from it all? We asked her a few questions.
HerCampus: What do you think it means to independent in college?
Emily: I think independence in college really comes down to making your own decisions. College presents students with a lot of decisions, some more important than others: What kind of people do I surround myself with? What should I do on the weekends? Should I go to class today? Should I go to class at all? For most people, college is the first time they have to make some of these decisions and the first time they have to make them without the direct influence of their parents, which is both a challenge and an opportunity. Independence means accepting the challenge that these choices present and taking advantage of the inherent opportunity to grow as an independent person by making the choice that is best for you.
HerCampus: You have so much going on Emily – internships, friends, schoolwork, boyfriend, etc. – how do you maintain a strong sense of self? How do you stay focused on what is right for you with the many distractions available at college?
Emily: I just try to focus on what is most important and keep my priorities in order. It’s all about balance. For example, doing well in school is incredibly important to me, but at the same time I realize that college is also about having fun. Organization helps too – I’m super into my schedules and planning things out- but you also have to be flexible. But really it all comes down to balance and just realizing what’s most important.
HerCampus: What led you to plunge in your adventure to China, even without knowing another study headed that far east?
Emily: I chose China for two reasons: the first reason was the language. I’ve been studying Chinese since I started at SJU, and I really wanted a chance to apply what I’d learned. I was very nervous, especially as the date of my departure approached. But as soon as I actually arrived in Beijing, I was so busy that I didn’t have time to be nervous! I had no choice but to throw myself into meeting new people and making new friends. And everyone was so friendly and excited to be there- making friends became really easy! And now I have friends at schools all over the country, which is awesome!
HerCampus: What did this great leap of faith teach you? How has it helped you and how will it continue to help you professionally and personally? Emily: It has taught me that going out of my comfort zone is extremely rewarding. It has also helped me become more relaxed and not over-think things too much: It sounds a little crazy- going to the other side of the world for four months without a single familiar face. I never would have met those people or had those experiences if I hadn’t just gone for it. It has also given me a little bit of a travel bug- I can’t wait to travel to the next place!
HerCampus: Would you have defined yourself as an independent person before your study abroad adventure?
Emily: I would have defined myself as independent, but I have definitely become more independent after going to China. I have also become more confident in the decisions I made independently and I’m more likely to be willing to go out of my comfort zone and try new things on my own. China taught me that I can do it! (As cheesy as that sounds) I can do anything, and so can any other girl! You just have to trust yourself, realize that you are intelligent and independent enough to do whatever you want, and go for it!
How to let your (personal) freedom flag fly high, according to Emily:
1. Put yourself out there, you can never have too many friends.
2. Make lots of friends, but realize the importance of having a solid group of true friends – these are the friends you will have for a lifetime, so take advantage of the time you have together in college!
Emily’s sense of adventure is remarkable and is often lost among social pressure on a college campus. Channeling your inner travel bug poses some serious challenges to collegiates; Will I miss my friends? Will I miss my boyfriend? What will I put on pause as I travel? Although taking a semester (or month, or week) does not stop time at home or at college, it is an experience unique to college students. Never before, and most likely, never again will the opportunity present itself to be immersed in a new culture without binding obligations and responsibilities. While the idea of living in a new country can seem daunting, the benefits far outweigh the fears a collegiate may have. Living abroad means adjusting abroad without American comforts. This process cannot be matched in shaping one’s personal responsibility and self-reliance – key tools for a functional and successful life, in both personal and professional environments. Living abroad also means exploration, especially of one’s self. The exposure and adventure that awaits overseas foster independence, character and provide opportunities for growth unmatched in your comfortable, everyday routine. A collegiates view of the world is changed during an abroad experience and while the language barrier may not last forever, her perspective of the globe’s landscapes, opportunities, cultures and people, will, including the her perspective of home.
However, not all of us have to travel across the globe to experience individual independence and the many personal rewards it brews. Claire Tedesco, ’15, led student organizations in high school, but found just how far her abilities extend when she tried out for the SJU Womens’ Crew team on a whim her freshman year. Battling cancer at a young age, Claire learned early on to lead a gracious and fulfilling life – and her schedule is more than filled, it’s overflowing. We sat down with the busy Food Marketing major to explore where she gets the confidence from to pursue her personal and professional dreams, but more importantly, to better the lives of others as well.
HerCampus: Claire, what does “independence” mean to you?
Claire: By definition, to be independent means to have freedom from control, influence, support, and aid, but in my humble opinion, I see it differently. I see independence not so much of what I want to do, but how I want to live my life. I know I have a purpose in this world and it is up to me to discover it.
HerCampus: What does it mean to you as a college student, an athlete and a woman entering her twenties?
Claire: As a college student, although I exercise my freedom by living two hours away from home, I could never do it without the support of my friends and my family. As an athlete, you sometimes feel like you cant push yourself any harder and then by the support of your teammates you are able to. Without my teammates I probably would have quit rowing within the first week. As a woman entering her twenties, you come to realize that this is the decade that big things happen. You graduate from college, move into your own apartment, get your first job, possibly get married and an even scarier thought, have a child.
HerCampus: Has there been any growth in your confidence and independence as a person from taking this great leap of faith?
Claire: The success I experienced from branching out of my comfort zone made me realize the potential pay-off of pushing my comfort zone. As soon as I become comfortable with something I am always trying out or signing up for something that isn’t.
HerCampus: Have you struggled with losing your sense of self, or has college allowed you to see yourself clearer?
Claire: As you may know, I am a 2 time cancer survivor and I am so very lucky and thank God every day for allowing me to live the life that I do. In the childhood cancer unit that I was a part of I was the only girl to survive. I have watched so many people that I was close with lose their battle to cancer. I have made it a goal of mine to live for them and never forget what I have fought. Lately I have become so consumed by my life that I began to forget. I started to loose myself and I was scared because it happens so easily. I signed myself up to go to Camp Make-A-Dream Montana early this summer to expose myself to young adult cancer survivors and patients. A large part of independence is being grateful for what you do have and the battle you fought to get there.
Tips from Claire on how to exercise your independence beyond getting ready for your red, white, and blue bikini:
1. Build your own confidence. Don’t look for compliments from other people, you need to find them yourself.
2. Be quiet; know the power of silence. To be an effective leader you have to listen to people. People believe that I am a quiet leader but I just like to listen before I speak so I have grasp on the whole concept before I ever open my mouth. I want to make sure the words I am saying are worth listening to.
3. I love quotes and I live by this quote every day, I have it hanging in my room. It was said by Conan O’Brien on his farewell address: “Please don’t be cynical. I hate cynicism — it’s my least favorite quality and it doesn’t lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.” I promise you if you live by this, good things will happen in mysterious ways.
Emily and Claire have both have found their niche, but if you’re still not convinced a study abroad experience or sport will happen for you, consider this: join a sorority or fraternity. Now you’re thinking ok, you’ve really gone too far. Yes, we all read the DG girl’s email from UMD, how more brain washed and stupid girls can get. But I promise you I haven’t met one president or even girl in a chapter here at SJU that is that nasty. On a serious note, sororities are a great source for making your experience at SJU your own, even when you’re a spring semester senior. A common conversation during rush period is for girls to say “I want to join a sorority to meet new people” and this is exactly what happens. If you give it a chance, friendships await you. Also, there are opportunities to take on leadership roles, give back to the community, and of course meet people (boys especially if you join a sorority). Not to mention, you’re never bored! When you’re in a sorority there is always something to do. It can feel a little boring at SJU in the fall because we don’t have a football team. However, if you’re in a sorority you will have a weekend activity. The business fraternities even offer superior career networking opportunities. You can do apart of both! Ok, ok, I’m almost done. Finally, the great thing about sororities and fraternities at SJU is that Greek life is extremely connected. It’s ok to have roommates in other sororities/fraternities, or ones that aren’t in one at all. Joining a sorority or fraternity may be your independent calling; it’s worth a try.
That about wraps it up for this section of Her Campus, but our last question for Claire in her interview seems to put it all together:
HerCampus: What advice do you have for collegiates who struggle with asserting themselves and their independence? What would you say to girls that want to branch out, but feel held back?
Claire: I can’t pretend that I am an expert on finding independence. I know what works for me but to give advice to someone that I have no idea about, the only thing that comes to mind is: branch out of your comfort zone. It seems like the biggest cliché but it truly works. Blaming someone else for hold you back is just an excuse. You have to take the initiative and in the words of Saint Ignatius “Set the world on Fire.”
HCXO
Taylor Rizzolino & Lexie Guistwhite