If you ask Joey Gorman ’16 what his first word was, he will give you a big smile and tell you without hesitation that it was “ball.”
And if you ask Joey how he started to get involved in baseball, he will tell you a story that his mom has told him; about how when he was two or three years old that he picked up a ball and threw it 38 feet across his living room.
“And it all just started from there, I then played T-ball at four [years old] and just played [baseball] ever since, all the way through” Said Joey.
After the T-ball days, Joey played baseball for a little league team, going on to play for his high school, and even summer ball for a local travel team, the Philadelphia Senators. So it came as no surprise that, when Joey made his college decision and decided to come to Saint Joseph’s University, he was going to play ball.
Being a Divison 1 Athlete is tough. There are mandatory study hall hours that you have to attend, practices that require you to wake up early, tons of traveling, and lifting sessions that you need to go to on top of maintaining a full course load of work. Going into college, Joey was ready to accept the challenge and was excited to meet the demands that came with being a Divison 1 Athlete. He was ready for the obstacles that came with this fast paced college lifestyle, and had plans of pitching to the best of his ability in all of the games he played.
Joey always knew that it was going to be challenging, but he never dreamed of the obstacles that he would have to face, and the chance that he might not be able to play competitive baseball ever again.
This is because when Joey was just 12 years old he was diagnosed with a condition known as Chiari Malformantion. A condition that is congenital, Joey found out he had it by accident while getting a sinus CAT scan.
“I was there for allergies and they did a CAT scan and they found it by accident. So people can live their whole life having one and not know it if they’re not symptomatic. It was so minor when they found it back then, that I was perfectly fine and they didn’t need to do any treatment.”
Joey explained what exactly Chiari Malformation is.
“So, the cerebellum, which is in the back part of your brain is either larger or like your skull is more narrow, depending upon the person. So, my cerebellum was too big for my skull and it caused it to be pressed down and pushed out of the spinal cavity and the lower it is, the worse it gets. Mine was very minute and they told me that over time it wouldn’t get worse.”
Despite what doctors initially told him, Joey’s condition did indeed get worse, something he would come to discover during a lifting session his freshman year with his SJU teammates.
“Freshman year before Halloween, we were doing leg presses and there was a heavy weight and I pushed out and as soon as I extended my legs, I felt a zap down the side of my neck and my teammates had to help me get the weight back up. It didn’t fall on me but it was at the point where I needed help to get the weight off and they picked it up…I felt the zap and I started to get a tingling in my arms and legs and the feeling was just off. I started getting lightheaded, I didn’t lose consciousness or anything but right away when I started feeling like that, I knew that something was wrong and I was thinking to myself, ‘I don’t want it to be that [Chiari malformation],’ but in the back of my mind, I kind of knew it was.”
Joey was taken in an ambulance and rushed to the emergency room where his parents and coach met him. They did an MRI that showed that his Chiari Malformation had gotten a lot worse and next thing he knew was that he was going to be having surgery. Joey’s dream of playing college baseball had to be put aside for him to focus on his health.
Joey’s first Chiari surgery was in November of 2012.
“So the first surgery was less invasive. What they do is they open you up and take a piece of the skull out and they hope that it gradually pushes the brain out of the spinal cavity if you take that piece out that is really pushing the brain down. But my spinal fluid is another thing that they tested out for Chiari patients. If your cerebral spinal fluid is not flowing, it continuously flows throughout the human body for everybody, but if it doesn’t flow, which Chiari stops it from flowing up top, it causes a cyst, called a syrinx, and if that is not taken care of it can deteriorate your spine. I had a large cyst in between my thoracic and lumbar, my middle and lower back, so the first surgery fixed that. I had to get a second surgery. I’ve had two brain (surgeries) and three done on my arm. I never fully got the same feeling back in my left arm; everything was just kind of tingling and numb.”
It goes without saying that Joey’s Chiari Malformation has been tough on him. When asked what the hardest part has been since his diagnosis and the surgeries, Joey selflessly explained that it was without a doubt watching his family go through this with him, stating that he wouldn’t want it to be happening to any one of them but him, saying how he would rather be the one suffering than watching one of them suffer. But not only has it been hard to watch the people he loves most suffer with him, the effect that it has had on him personally has been pretty tough too.
“ I guess one of the biggest struggles has been accepting that it has happened and that I can’t go back to who I was in high school. Also, accepting that baseball is on the backburner. I’m just trying to accept that I am alive rather than not. From a baseball standpoint…it’s hard to explain. Realizing that it [baseball] is not that important now, when it has been my whole life- It got me to college. But then just from a regular standpoint, the daily headaches and joint pain and I’ve just got to accept day-by-day going through the whole thing. It kind of sucks, I feel like an old man, but you know, it happened for a reason. I guess just accepting it mentally sometimes is harder than the physical stuff.”
But Joey is resilient-instead of succumbing to his diagnosis; he has decided to live his life with the mentality that “losing is not an option.” With big hopes of being able to play baseball competitively again the way he did in high school, Joey has been working hard at achieving his goal. He has been practicing along with his teammates, and has even been able to bat in some games this season. Determined to get back on that mound, Joey has dedicated his time to getting better, and has had a positive outlook on his situation and life.
In fact, early this year Joey decided that he was going to start a foundation to raise awareness for Chiari Malformation. He started selling shirts strictly to raise awareness with the words “Losing Is Not An Option” on the front of them. Posting about his journey on both Facebook and Instagram, Joey has been tirelessly working to help teach others about Chiari Malformation, as well as inspire other people who have it to never give up. He has also started a GoFundMe page, to help raise money for Chiari Malformation Research and is now working to make the Foundation official.
“When I did more research on this condition, I discovered that it is diagnosed just as frequent as other things and no one knows about it. No one knows what it is and it’s your brain, the most important part of your body and I feel like there should be more awareness for it. I just don’t want anyone else to go through what I went through, like how much my life has changed [because of Chiari]. It’s changed in good ways and in bad ways, but I wouldn’t change what happened to me, because I think it has made me a better person and it’s making me do something that I wouldn’t have done if I was just playing baseball. Maybe there needs to be that first person to start for Chiari and it wasn’t my plan, but maybe it was God’s plan, and I was sort of lucky to have a pedestal being a Division 1 College athlete and I can use that as my way to get attention for something that not many people know about…I want [Chiari] to be on the mouths of everybody, so the next person that goes into CHOP for the same surgeries that I had, might have access to more tests or the right therapy or just something that I might not have had to make their life a little easier.”
When asked what this whole journey has taught him, Joey had this to say.
“One thing it has taught me is to take it day by day. What I would hope for? I would hope that I can be back to a point where I can play baseball competitively again just to prove a point that if you make it out okay then this isn’t a death sentence or the end of your life. If one person can come back, that gives hope to other people, so me playing wouldn’t be for the purpose of me personally playing again, it would be to prove to the other people that you CAN do something, you CAN do anything…it’s not the end.”