It’s that time of the year again.
It has reached the time of year when I have officially entered the second-semester blues.
Ever since winter break, I have been in a cycle of anxiety and despair regarding the mystery of my future. The realization that every decision I make during these developmental years will directly affect how the rest of my life goes, has sent me into a spiral. With the overthinking in full effect, I am now unsure about my major, my classes, my work, and myself overall.
It feels like everyone around me is on the board of an organization or working an amazing internship, while I’m just existing. Yes, I’m taking a full load of classes and I make sure to have a social life here and there, but it’s still just a mellow and unproblematic existence. I don’t feel like it’s enough.
Both high school and college advisors have always told me that my concerns were normal and relatable to many other students. I have heard the common tale that the first two years of college are about the trials and tribulations that lead you toward your greatness… right? So why am I a second-semester junior (just a year from graduating), still questioning everything?
It’s the pressure to be great.
Society’s standard of living has directly impacted how college students feel about post-grad life. Many of us are worried about finding a job that both pays well and leaves us satisfied. The job market is so unpromising, which makes it very difficult to stay motivated in studying.
I have heard so many stories of people not finding a job for years even with their degree, which makes me deathly worried about myself. I question if I have what it takes to make it in the ‘real’ world, outside of my college bubble. And to be honest, I am worried about not finding a job in my field at all and being forced to remain in the shackles of minimum wage retail for all eternity.
I am not longing to be rich and miserable or poor and happy. All I want is the obtainable middle ground, but even that isn’t secured for me with a bachelor’s degree.
So it makes me question, what’s the point of this all?
I have to remind myself that I am nothing without knowledge. As corny as it may sound, knowledge genuinely is the key to life. We can do so much with what we learn, it makes the possibilities for our dream life endless.
Graduating with a degree means that I have enough expertise in a subject to perform at an excellent level. It means that I have dedicated four years of my life to growing as a student, adult, and individual. All of the experiences that college has provided me with have opened up an infinite number of opportunities that are just waiting to be explored.
Working on group projects, writing research papers, joining new organizations and friend groups, taking interest in fun hobbies, taking in the city of San Jose, etc. are all transferable skills that I can use to my advantage. It’s just a matter of my own hustle to reach my potential. It starts with believing that I can.
I need to believe and manifest that everything that I have worked so hard for, will be coming my way in full effect. Making myself remember that my journey is different from everyone else will allow me to appreciate all that I’ve done for myself, at my own pace. There is no reason to compare myself to others and be the thief of my own happiness. The universe has a plan, even though we might forget that it does.
At the end of it all, I will know that my work paid off and I made a change.
I will feel proud of the road I took and the decisions I made on the journey. I will feel comfortable in my skin and career. I will live the life that I want and it will be enough.
Are you or someone you know feeling the second-semester blues? Let us know @HerCampus SJSU