20 Tinder Bios You Probably Shouldn't Use

  1. “Not tryna be your daddy or your dad. Just tryna be mentally stable.”
  2. “My ideal first date usually ends with you leaving my place regretting this ever happened.”
  3. “Just need a boy to like my pictures and call me pretty. No further contact. If you try to flirt I will report you.”
  4. “I’m a Gemini.”
  5. “I don’t understand what this “vine” is that everybody’s talking about.”
  6. “Biggest Logan Paul fan.”
  7. *says age is 21* “Currently a sophomore in high school. I like older girls.”
  8. “My ideal Friday night consists of crafting with cat hair.”
  9. “Swipe in the direction of your political beliefs ;) if we match you can ride this Trump train.” (Yes. This is actually a real one. Gotta love SFA boys.)
  10. “My mom made this account for me.”
  11. “Puppies just aren’t that cute.”
  12. “Please like and subscribe, use my discount code “swipe right” to get a whole bunch of disappointment.”
  13. “6”, 1’ Those are two different measurements.” (all credit goes to my man Neil Hilborn for that one)
  14. “Me and Subway have the same definition of “foot long.” We both lie and say we have it.”
  15. “I don’t message first.”
  16. “My mom really wants a grandchild.”
  17. “Am I the tinder version of the craigslist killer? Swipe right and find out.”
  18. “Lactose intolerant, but addicted to cheese. It’s a messy situation.”
  19. “Me and my mom are looking for a roommate.”
  20. “Swipe right to get your round-trip ticket to pound town and then back to your place where I’ll never attempt to contact you ever again. But I’ll still like all your Instagram photos.”