You know that time of day when you’re hungry and it turns out that 800 of your collegiate peers are hungry as well? That is called 12:15 on Tuesdays and Thursdays in Sewanee. McClurg can be pretty intimidating. Whatever line you choose is undoubtedly a 15 minute wait, while undoubtedly running into anyone and everyone you saw the previous weekend. So for everyone out there who suffers from McClurg-induced social anxiety, you are not alone. Therefore, here are a couple pro-tips if you really want that omelet at 12:30.
1. Buddy system – Don’t be afraid to link arms with a pal. This way you have a confidant who can tell you if there’s lettuce in your teeth, your fly is unzipped, or that boy you like is staring. It’s practically foolproof.
2. Good ol’ Brown Bag – Just put a bag on your head. A sort of invisibility cloak, this system protects your anonymity, while still having outward visibility of everyone else. Since no one knows your identity, you don’t need the buddy system! Genius!
3. Change your arrival time – Try to go a little early, or go a little late if this is possible. This means come at 12 instead of 12:15!
***DISCLAIMER: Sometimes, 600 of your 800 hungry peers may be on your wavelength. Unfortunately, there’s nothing you can do about this except pat yourself on the back for your proactive Clurg endeavor. In this unfortunate case, take comfort in the relatively short wait at the cereal bar, and know that it is close to both doors in case you need an accessible escape route.
4. Alcoves – These little nooks allow for visibility, but they are still private. This is a great intimate space on frat side with minimal social anxiety. A place where you are free to eat what you want and how you want. Therefore, if your etiquette game is lacking, and you are conscious of this flaw, the alcove is the place for you.
5. Drunk clurg – The food never tasted so good.