I have been a fan of Lana Del Rey since my pre-teen fingers downloaded the Tumblr app.
Her poetry, her songs, her style, it all lives within me.
With this said, it should be obvious that it has been one of my life goals to see her live. I worried that this day would never come before she stopped touring completely or making music, being that she loves the West Coast and I have always been too young when she was touring to attempt going to one of her concerts.
Her true fans know that Ms. Grant does as she pleases when she pleases.
As of recently, it seems that she has been putting her family and sanity first. It is the comforting tone in her music that makes me think of home and family which lead me to wonder if she would ever tour this far North. But thankfully, her family comes with her on tour.
When she mentioned her father, she looked into the wings of the stage and smiled.
When I heard that she was coming to Pittsburgh, I knew that I had to go.
As soon as she stepped on stage I started crying.
I did not cry because she opened with one of my favorites of her songs. I just could not even believe that I was in the same vicinity as this amazing person whom I love so much, and have loved for so long.
Lana has had many stages in her life, and you can sense them in her music. She started her singing career at a very young age, and gradually gained popularity over the years.
Lana has also had her bouts with addiction which has taken many years off of her touring and public appearing career to protect her own peace. She has been sober for some time now.
To see her physically on stage and smiling while performing was enlightening.
As someone who has loved her so much from afar, I had to pinch myself that she was real and in person.
Her setlist included some old and new songs like Cherry and Arcadia. At one point she stopped, knelt down to the crowd, and said, “Isn’t this crazy that we have been singing these songs together for 12 years?”
Her saying that touched me truly because I remember listening to her album Born to Die when it came out in 2012.
Her dancers, fellow vocalists, and musicians on stage seemed as though they were hand-picked. They were not the traditional tightly-choreographed group, which I am sure she set for a reason. They were real people who had real passions just as she does.
It was an eclectic vibe. She would do this.
There were times throughout the concert when I realized how quiet it was, especially when she would talk inbetween songs.
Everyone just listened to the one person that knew how to put feelings into words, like it was a service for us to be able to connect to our own intuition.
In one of these moments, my friend whispered to me, “It’s like we’re at church.”
Before the last song of her setlist, she sat down and asked to take a minute to share some words with everyone.
She wanted to say that it was the second to last stop of her tour and that she had been enjoying every minute of it. She then said that she is getting too old to be touring. Then, she thanked everyone and mentioned how wonderful it is that human beings can gather like this.
She then said that she would like to put positive manifestations into the air or to out whatever greater power you believe in, because 20,000 heads are better than one.
Everyone at the venue took a minute to wish for whatever they needed.
She then said that she hoped that if anyone came here lonely they found friends or someone to spend time with, and that every boyfriend that came here with their girlfriend loved her even more for realizing how much she loves music.
She then performed her last song, “Did you know that theres a tunnel under Ocean Blvd”, and without an encore or any second-guessing, left off the stage by singing the last verse of the song, “Don’t forget me.”
I wonder if she will stop touring after this tour. I do not think that she has ever been or will ever be someone who is known for her love for traveling and touring.
But I do know that she has created a community of people that love her so dearly, throughout all parts of her life and her music.
Even if she does not tour again, she still touches so many hearts in so many ways.
On the car ride home, I was left in awe. I am still in awe. I do not know if I could ever fully describe the way that her presence left me feeling.
How could someone that I have placed as so ethereal be so real? I was left in awe and will be for some time but mostly, I will be left wondering how it is that I live in a world where I can not personally tell her how much I love her.
And the thought of that makes me start crying all over again.