My brain never shuts off.
My internal monologue, along with my endless thoughts, swirl around in my brain 24/7. I pose many questions to myself, consciously or not, in one day. “Did I do all of my work? Do those people like me? Did I talk too much in that one class earlier?” I am a chronic overthinker who will replay a situation over again in my mind a million times again.
This all ties into the perception of self. How you view yourself, and why you hold these beliefs about yourself are a crucial part of your identity. I have noticed that my life changes following how I treat myself. If I am loving and nurturing to myself, I generally see positive change reflected in the world around me. Conversely, if I am abrasive, mean, or overly critical of myself, the world seems a little less kind.
In just two years of college so far, I have learned countless lessons. One of the main concepts I have grasped is the thought of control. For better or worse, I cannot control everything. I apply this to the concept of self-talk. I will never be able to control what people are saying or thinking about me. In a way, it’s actually none of my business. How people talk about you is not a reflection of you, but their inner self. While I cannot control the public narrative of me, I am in direct control of how I talk to myself each day.
I have a repertoire of rituals I perform each morning to help me conquer my day. I put on my favorite playlist (country of course) and dance as I do my makeup and hair. It helps me set the tone for my day and ensure that although I have no control over how the day will unfold, I can create small moments of joy regardless. Another key component of my mornings is my self-talk. It’s a universal experience to look at ourselves in the morning and think “Yikes!” I’m no stranger to undereye bags, disheveled hair, and acne breakouts when I wake up in the morning. I could choose to stand in front of the mirror and nitpick parts of my appearance. Instead, I like to look in the mirror and think “Hey gorgeous!” or “How cool is it that we get to be alive today?” These statements sound terribly cheesy, I know. Yet for me, speaking highly of myself has changed my life.
It’s easy to cheer ourselves on when life is going well. The true test is how we speak to ourselves when life, or other people, put us in challenging, uncomfortable situations. Though a strong support system is imperative, our needs and desires need to be met by ourselves first. College has taught me to be my own biggest cheerleader. To me, this illuminating life lesson is far more valuable than a 4.0 or perfect resume.