The piece of advice I heard the most before starting college was to get out there, join clubs and not stay in your dorm too much. As an extrovert who loves meeting people, I was not too worried about ‘getting out there’, but any advice to a nervous freshman was appreciated. What I didn’t realize at the time is that not all advice is for everyone.
Joining clubs and getting involved in your community is important, but it is also important to understand your limits, and not to stretch yourself too thin. Whether it is a club, activity or just hanging out with friends, there can be a point where too much is too much. Being in my first semester of college and wanting to make memories, I thought I needed to constantly be around people. Even as someone who loves socializing, I was starting to get burned out.
If my day did not start with a class, it would start with me asking my friends who was free to do something with me. It started to feel weird being by myself because I wasn’t used to it anymore. I was constantly in class, in a club or asking someone to hang out. I only used my dorm to sleep, and barely got a moment to myself. Even if I was going to eat, someone would be there with me.
Going home for break was a huge shock to me. I went from constantly being around people my age to having a lot of down time to myself. I would spend hours at a time alone working on hobbies that I never had time for when I was constantly around people. I realized that even as an extrovert, having alone time is important. I was able to discover new parts of my personality and explore how much I grew during my first semester in a way that I had not been able to do before.
As the new semester starts, I am keeping in mind the positives that being alone can have. While I still ask my friends to hang out with me a lot, and I don’t tend to eat alone in the dining hall, taking time to study by myself or spend time in my dorm has already given me a new and recharged energy. I have had more time to communicate with my family at home, and more time to focus purely on my academics.
Being alone can be scary and difficult, but getting out of your comfort zone is one of the most important parts of life. Through this semester, I am going to challenge myself to do activities alone I was previously terrified to try.
The effects even within my first week of this new semester have been prominent. I have grown closer to my friends through the distance and become closer to myself. I am never going to be an introvert, but I am going to be someone who can appreciate that people need time to relax and to step back from the world. From studying to eating by myself, I am embracing aloneness and accepting the freedom that comes with it.