There are many things that make up my identity, my hobbies, my values, my womanhood. But the thing that I feel is one of the most defining factors of myself is that, first a foremost, I am a sister.
I’m the middle child of three girls, and I wouldn’t want it any other way. However, for a good chunk of my life it was just me and my older sister. We would do everything together. Heck, we shared a room our entire lives.
Yes, growing up we would have our occasional fights and disagreements, but looking back I can’t really remember much of the bad memories because so much of them were great.
I had the privilege of growing up with an older sister who was such a great role model. She’s incredibly smart, kind, funny, and more responsible than I ever could be. I grew up never worrying about feeling lonely because I had a built-in best friend that I knew would always have my back.
Like I said, much of my early childhood it was just the two of us, but my little sister came along when I was seven, and I can’t imagine how life would be without her. I especially couldn’t imagine life if I had gained a brother instead of another girl.
I got to play big sister now, and, though I probably wasn’t as good at the whole role model thing as my older sister, I hope she has as many good memories of her childhood with me that I have with her.
Due to the bigger age gap, my little sister didn’t always have her big sisters with her to rely on like I had, and I sometimes feel I realized this too late. But, when she was going through the energy-filled kid faze, I was going through the moody-teenager faze, which don’t really mesh unfortunately.
However, I would consider us to be very close now. We bond over shows; like Avatar: The Last Air Bender, or Percy Jackson; go on excursions to bubble-tea cafes and trinket stores; and sprawl out in each other’s rooms for a good old gossip-sesh.
All in all, I couldn’t be more thankful for the fact that I am a sister to these two amazing girls.
There is something so sweet about sisterhood that I feel having a brother could not compare. We grow up being able to relate to many things with each other. We can complain about the growing pains of going through puberty as a young girl, without shame, and smooth over the insecurities we collect pertaining to our bodies because we know how it feels and would never wish that on each other.
We steal each other’s clothes, and bits of each other’s personality because, deep down, we always wanted to be a little bit like one another, despite telling people you are offended at the thought of it.
I personally think that you have never felt true happiness if you have never gone on a “sister-spree” where you grab a sweet treat, hit the mall, get lunch, then go on a walk through a park whilst gabbing about family drama, before driving home with the music blasting and the windows down while you and your sisters scream the lyrics at the top of your lungs.
One time my sisters and I spent hours just laughing about a single lemon that we purchased at the grocery store. Heck, I’m laughing about it right now as I write about it. Every moment is a good moment when we are together.
Everything about being with my sisters now is filled with excitement and happiness because it feels like we hardly see each other anymore.
Watching my sister move into college and staring at her empty bed next to me in our childhood bedroom, and then having to hug my little sister goodbye on move-in day were probably the most heartbreaking moments of my life.
The bond we have with each other is so strong that I never have to worry about becoming estranged, but it is a different kind of pain when you have to acknowledge that you won’t always just be three girls growing up together under the same roof, or that you won’t be able to walk just across the hallway to see your best friend.
No matter how far apart we are, my sisters are still in everything I do.
My little sister makes sure to keep my sense of humor at a middle-school level, and the playlists that my older sister had sent me are constantly playing in my headphones. They’re the reason why I sob anytime I watch Greta Gerwig’s Little Women and they’re the reason why I’ve shed some tears while writing this very article.
They’re the reason why I love being a woman so much because what else could I ever want to be than be a sister.
“We Were Girls Together”
– Toni Morrison