Over a week ago, Ambrose students were greeted by a peculiar message when they opened their campus mailboxes. A colorful flyer entitled “The Bee News” was distributed through campus mail, and its story reads as follows:
“First Year Wendy Webster wanted to stay in, read a good book, eat a bowl of popcorn, and relax but her friend Pattie Popular wanted to go to a house party where there would be alcohol but didn’t want to go alone. While Pattie was talking to a mutual friend, Wendy was sexually assaulted in the kitchen of the off-campus residence. Pattie noted Wendy’s absence and went looking for her, only to find Wendy severely upset and physically shaking. Wendy confided in Pattie 3 days later about what happened and Pattie cannot forgive herself for not being able to keep her friend safe.”
The flyer was intended to get readers thinking about the concerns surrounding parties and drinking, but students were quick to point out the underlying hurtful message about sexual assault and victim blaming.
In this hypothetical situation, it is understandable to imagine that Pattie would feel bad about what happened. Pattie may feel sad for her friend and angry that such an awful thing would happen to an innocent girl. What this “Bee News” failed to articulate, though, was that Pattie should never feel guilty for what happened, nor should Wendy. The only person in this situation who is to be blamed is the sexual assaulter.
This flyer inadvertently sent out the message that women either should not go to parties or they should never ever feel secure enough to wander away from their group of friends (and heaven forbid they want to have a drink or two!). Perhaps if Pattie had bought one of those cutesy child-leashes for Wendy and held onto her all night, this terrible incident could have been avoided.
Get real, “Bee News.”
Now, members of the university have made attempts to rectify the situation, apologizing if the note had an unintended, hurtful effect on students. A clarification note was put into students’ mailboxes later on, stating: “We will work more extensively in the future to review messages more thoroughly before they are sent.” The problem has been addressed, so you may be asking why we should still bother to talk about it.
The reality is that the terror and trauma of sexual assault does not just live between the lines of Pattie and Wendy’s story. It’s an issue that is extremely prevalent on college campuses, Ambrose included. This flyer’s misguided message emphasizes the need to create a dialogue about rape and sexual assault between students and administrators.
A recent survey went out to students asking them to give their impression on their experience with sexual violence and college culture here at SAU, and one of the questions asked if students felt the college officials could be doing more to protect students from harm.
The obvious answer to this question is yes. There’s always more that can be done to help students feel safe at school, but Ambrose has admittedly made some great strides, mainly through SAU SAAT. SAAT is, according to their Facebook page, “a group dedicated to helping those affected by sexual assault, and raising awareness surrounding the issue of sexual assault.” They have annual programs like “Walk a Mile in Her Shoes” and “Are You Afraid of the Dark?,” and they sponsor film presentations and talks, like the recent presentation of “The Invisible War.” They are committed to working with the university to make Ambrose as safe and positive of an environment as possible.
As the university (hopefully) continues to make strides in educating students on sexual assault and rape and ensuring that all students are safe and respected, here are some of the things that you can do for yourself and friends:
· Make yourself aware of the locations of the blue emergency security poles around campus, and have campus security’s number programmed into your phone (563-333-6104).
· Be open and caring if a friend comes to talk to you about a problem. It doesn’t matter where they were, what they were wearing, or how much they were drinking. Victim blaming is never okay.
· Stand up when something is wrong. If you see someone behaving aggressively or you know someone who has committed a sexual crime and is still on campus, speak up or seek help. Take safe and appropriate actions to reach out to others and help them avoid danger.
· Get the help you need. You can visit SAU’s Counseling Center on 2nd floor Rogalski to talk or call the 24-hour crisis line in an emergency (563-421-2975).
· Always remember that you are beautiful, you are valuable, and you deserve the respect of others. BEE confident, BEE brave, but most of all—BEE yourself!
Sources: SAU SAAT Facebook, SAU Counseling Center, and “The Bee News”
Picture: SAU SAAT Facebook