There are many tips to help you survive your first year in college: the studying tips, dating tips and even the friendship tips. Yes, there are many tips on making new friends, but what about the old ones. I always hear stories of people who have been best friends for years and then they get to college, and somehow that friendship disappears into thin air.
I remember the nights when I had to say goodbye to my best friends from high school the night before they left for their first year of college. The cars were fully packed, and their room, where we once spent hours talking, became a quiet place. I remember thinking “Is it ever going to be the same?” Don’t get me wrong, not all friendships last from high school, but I think in college, you learn a lot about who you are as a person and what you want in a friendship. The friendships you made in high school or even in your childhood will last for years if you stay connected. I am still very close to my group of friends I graduated with, because I think it’s very important to stay invested in their lives.
Tip #1
Make the effort to stay connected!
One of my best friends completely turned herself into the future editor-in-chief of Vogue at her university. As she became so involved in extracurricular activities with her major in fashion merchandising, staying in contact with her on a daily basis was becoming hard. I began to be busy making new friends and my classes. Now, I am sure all new college students have experienced this with one of their best friends. It’s always important to not get frustrated with the other, and support them through difficult times throughout the year. My friend and I always remembered that no amount of distance was ever going to ruin our friendship. The time spent catching up through texting, calling each other, Skyping, and even when we finally became reunited; that was the time that was cherished.
Spending some much-needed bonding time at the Iowa State Fashion Show! #fashiontherapy
Tip #2
Reunite on your own terms!
I know some of you can hardly wait to see each other at Thanksgiving or over Christmas break, but why wait until then? You’re in college now, and you definitely don’t need anyone’s permission to go wherever you want. A good way to look forward to seeing your friends is making plans to see them. Last year, my friends and I got tickets to a concert in town and my friend came and stayed with me. Going to a concert with my two best friends was one of the greatest moments of my freshman year.
I also reunited with my best friends by going to a Broadway show. We drove up to see my friend and went to see one of our favorite shows. We mentally prepared for this event my listening to the music on repeat and talked every night up until the day we saw each other and freaked out! We couldn’t be happier we were all together and doing something that we all enjoy!
Emily, Mary Kate, and I at the Eric Church concert!
Allie, Jane and I being goofy at the Addams Family Musical!
Tip #3
Be supportive!
Changing your environment is hard enough, especially with new people too. Making new friends is part of the new college experience. Sometimes it can be hard hearing your best friend making a new “best friend” and moving on with their lives. It’s always important to support that friend, and listen to their stories. Being jealous is not going to solve or help anything. Being open to their friends will your college transition easier and when you visit them at their college/university it will be more enjoyable, because you can always talk to more people!
Besides making new friendships, you or your friend could be having a difficult time adjusting to college. I remember I had a friend who had a horrible transition into college. Making friends was difficult and the classes seemed harder than expected. Reaching out to that friend was difficult at times because sometimes they didn’t get back to me. I wrote my friend letters, sent them a motivational text or simply leaving a voicemail. Later, I found out these little gestures were more appreciated that I thought. My acts of kindness got my friend through the toughest days.
Being in college taught me to always be there for my friends no matter the distance, the number of, or lack of, times you have talked in the past month, and the circumstances between you two.
“There is no distance too far between friends, for friendship gives wings to the heart.” – Unknown