So in case you haven’t heard the news, University Edge is the newest SMC dorm.
Not actually, but after half off Papa Smurfs and CJ’s pitchers on Saturday nights, you can find about 75% of the senior class curled up on Edge couches, eating pizza bagels, and watching Summer Heights High.
Now don’t get me wrong, dorm life rocks, but there’s something about having your own fully stocked apartment that really promotes the Sunday Smick lifestyle. So this is how the typical Sunday usually works at University Edge: Building 6:
4 pm – the first text is sent through the group thread. Usually looks something like “Guys guys guys…need cheese dip. Stat.” The conversation continues until someone has finally offered to run to the store to get Velveeta and wine from Michigan. Everyone migrates to one apartment, still in pajama pants and Dri Fits as the “come over” texts become more hostile “REPORT TO WHALE TAIL NOW. YOU HAVE NO CHOICE.”
5 pm – The crockpots are heating up various dips. Because smicks love cheese dips and crockpots.
6 pm – Someone mentions School of Rock…so obviously School of Rock is immediately put on tv.
7 pm – After a couple glasses of wine everyone starts complaining about how much homework they have. “UGGGGH I should totally be studying right now.” “My comp is due… like now and I haven’t even started.” “I should not be doing this right now.” This motivates no one to actually do any work but at least we talked about it…so it basically counts.
8 pm – Someone breaks out Spicy Uno or Catchphrase…board games ensue. We get way too in to it.
9 pm – The countertop becomes a buffet of queso, tortilla chips, monogrammed wine glasses, quesadillas, Doritos, homemade popcorn, and anything else we could find in the pantry that wasn’t eaten at 2 am over the weekend. Binge eating ensues.
10 pm – Someone talks about ordering a pizza. Someone orders a pizza.
11 pm – Someone puts on Summer Heights High. Fourteen separate snap stories are made to document how #lazy and #basic we are while holding wine glasses.
12 pm – The second wind occurs. Someone puts on “I’m Coming Out” by Diana Ross. Lots of dancing on chairs happens. Someone inevitably says “IT’S SENIOR YEAR WHY AREN’T WE DOING ANYTHING!?” No one moves.
1 pm – Everyone is asleep on the couches. Finally, one by one, smicks leave to their own apartments (right across the hall from each other) and pass out in the same pajamas they were in all day.
10 am – Its Monday morning, the apartment smells like cheese and none of my homework is done. Edge Sunday = totally worth it.
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