Have you ever doubted yourself? Felt insecure? Didn’t feel good about yourself? Put yourself last before everything or everyone else? If you answered yes to any of the above, stick around.
The road to self-love and self-acceptance is a difficult one to embark on. It’s emotionally draining and sometimes you feel helpless and not worthy, but realizing you can be your own #1 fan makes the whole journey totally worth it. You can have a million friends and family members who care so much about you, but at the end of the day, you are the only person who will be there for you for the rest of your life. No one else is guaranteed.
First off, imposter syndrome is REAL. Imposter syndrome is severe self-doubt and lack of belief in yourself. Anything good or exciting that comes to you, may make you feel like you don’t deserve it or can cause confusion as to why something so amazing would happen to you. Something amazing happened to you because you DESERVE it. You worked hard, you are qualified, you manifested it, etc. Believe that you do deserve success, love and everything in between.
You need to realize that you are the most important person in your life. If you can’t love yourself, be proud of yourself, challenge yourself and be your own biggest fan— how can you expect anyone else to be that for you if you can’t even accept it from yourself? Let alone, how can you be able to give that love and support to anyone else if you can’t give it to yourself first? Everything in life stems from the relationship you have with you. Treat yourself with respect, empathy, love and appreciation. Would you treat someone else with that? Most likely yes. So, why would you treat everyone except you that way?
If you spoke to your loved ones the way you speak to yourself in your own head, how would they feel about your relationship with them? Not great.
With all this being said, it’s time to focus on YOU. There is nothing wrong with being selfish in the sense that it’s for your relationship with yourself. Once you fully start to appreciate yourself in all your glory, your other relationships will bloom to a whole new level.
Taken from Psychology today, here are three ways you can learn to love yourself.
1. Care equally as much about yourself as you do others
People often don’t do this because they think it leads to being selfish in a negative way, and that your own needs aren’t important. False.
2. Maintain your boundaries
Know what you need from others emotionally. Tell them what is important to you. When someone ignores what is important to you, you will know because it doesn’t feel too great. So, tell others what your boundaries are and if they aren’t respecting that, have a conversation. Forgive them or not, based on the situation. Be assertive, know what you want and need. If those people cannot respect your needs, then maybe you need to reconsider the relationship. You owe it to yourself to get what you deserve from others whether it’s a romantic or platonic relationship.
3. Do what you need to do to be you
Find what you love, what makes you feel good, what makes you happy. Don’t let anyone judge you or criticize you for it. Taking time to do things that you love will make you a happier, better person, leading to you being better for yourself and others.
With all that being said, I think everyone should work on the relationship they have with themselves before allowing others in. You will notice a huge shift in how you carry yourself through life.