My Biggest Hook Up Pet Peeve (Literally)

So here I am in one of the steamiest hookups I’ve had in a while. We fumble for the door, and clothes are flying. He pushes me on the bed, and I’m so ready for what’s about to come next. I turn my head and then I see it. Right next to me on the bed.


His dog.

Don’t get me wrong, I love dogs! At the moment, however, seeing your overweight dog sprawled out on your bed does not get me in the mood.

I say, “Um, can you move your dog?”

“In a minute,” he says, still at the moment.

I’m sorry, but what? You’re really going to let your dog be the witness our sinful acts? I literally cannot look this dog in the eyes anymore. The sad puppy eyes evoked a sense of guilt within me. The look on a dogs face after witnessing sex are unlike any other puppy eyes I’ve seen.

I cannot begin to count the number of times I have experienced a hook up where the guy let his furry friend be in the room, and even on the bed. Is this normal? The whole time he is inside me I can’t help but be so concerned about the animal. What are they thinking? Are they sad their spot on the bed has been occupied by some chick?

To anyone out there who's about to get frisky in front of Frisky, please for the love of God take them out of the room! And if you have a studio apartment or something, please get them out of my line of vision. The last thing I want to see is your doggy during doggy style! Thanks!