Have you ever noticed that once you know a person, I mean really know them for who they are, you can see their beauty inside and out regardless of the impressions you once had? Now more than ever society feels a need to judge us based on how we look. Body-shaming is a social “norm” that needs to be removed from society.
I bet if you go up to anyone and ask them if they have ever been upset by a name they were called, a comment they overheard, or a rumor that was started, they will tell you “yes.” This stuff happens to everyone. We all have those things we cannot overlook when we look in the mirror, things we wish we could change or that we are already trying to change. That is normal. But nobody should feel the audacity to feed into our pre-existing insecurities and tell us what we need to change.
Another important thing to note is that body shaming goes both ways; we should not ridicule anyone for their body whether they’re curvy, petite, muscular, whatever. Everyone is unique. I mean, could you imagine a world where there was one type of girl and one type of guy? Even in my best attempts that vision is extremely unsettling, so let’s appreciate the bodies we have with these 4 steps to say BYE to body-shaming!
1. Be proud of who you are and what you have to offer.
We are all our own individuals, and we need to own our individuality. I used to (let’s be honest, I still do sometimes) worry that I looked to manly or muscular. I’ve always been really athletic; gymnastics, football, baseball, basketball, track, soccer…. the list really goes on and on. Therefore, I haven’t really known an “off season” and I felt like my appearance showed that too much. As I’ve gotten older I realize that muscles have their own beauty, and that its okay for me to be a little bigger than I once wanted to be, it gives me character, and helps me achieve my athletic success. Do not be threatened by someone who appears better, prettier, (insert adjective of your choice)… than you. Because someone is looking at you saying the same things. Instead walk around with confidence in yourself and be true to who you are… beYOUtiful!
2. Remind yourself of all that you love about you, frequently!
Whether its Post-it’s on your desk, lipstick on your mirror, or notes saved to yourself on your phone, tell yourself how amazing you are! At home, my mom usually kept messages (quotes, bible verses, love messages to me specifically, or even just a heart/smiley face symbol) on our shared bathroom mirror. I remember reading them and trying to apply them to myself as I watched the person staring back at me. They gave me confidence, made me smile and reminded me of my inner beauty. I can attest to the success these reminders can have so don’t hesitate to leave these notes for others too, we all can use a little reminder to love ourselves. If we could somehow all become more confident in ourselves, there would be far fewer bullies, because nobody would feel the need to rank themselves with others or put people down. I am definitely guilty of forgetting to see the best parts of myself, or comparing myself to others when I don’t need to. It can really hold you back from seeing your own value and potential.
3. It’s okay to want change, just make sure it’s for yourself.
I always tell myself I want to change and start “looking better” on a daily basis. For those who know me, I am 99% of the time in comfy clothes with my hair up–I really only dress up when I’m told to for a track meet or special event. What can I say, I like to be comfortable! But when I’m walking around campus and I see how great everyone else looks I feel a need to look better myself. Its a work in progress. I don’t feel like I need to look good for anyone, bu sometimes just having make-up on and straightening my hair is that extra confidence boost I need to get through a rough week (honestly thats about as dressed up as I can get since I normlly have to dress for practice, which without a doubt always falls in the middle of my day). Regardless, it is okay to want these changes for yourself, whether you’re starting a new diet, dragging yourself to the gym, deciding to dress up more, or whatever it may be. If it’s for the right reason, it will hopefully increase your self love and make you feel like the rockstar you are.
4. Stop putting each other down.
We all love Meghan Trainor’s song “All About that Bass”; the girl is proud of her body type and fiercely shows it. However, certain parts of her song express the same body-shaming that she is trying to fight. Regardless of how confident someone seems, or acts, they don’t need to be put down. Even Barbie responded to this mindset and came out with a whole new line of dolls with varying heights, body types, and ethicities. If future generations can grow up in a society where appreciating all body types is the norm, where Barbies and people and beauty are seen and loved for uniqueness, body-shaming, depression due to rumors and name calling, eating disorders, etc. could all start to fade away. Let’s be the change in this far-too-prolonged era of judgement and ridicule and start a new era of self love and body positivity!