I’m an artist.
Well, I guess you could tell by the title of this article.
I’m not a professional by any means yet, but being an illustration major means I could get there a lot sooner than I anticipated.
This… is a problem for me. Not a big one, more like a nagging thought at the back of my mind. Being an artist is something I’ve wanted to do for a long time. It feels like the only thing I’m good at nowadays. But doing it professionally? Full time? Straight out of college?
I feel oddly unprepared for this.
But the question is why? Why do I feel this way? Why am I so uncertain about my own future?
I’ve thought about this a lot. I think it all comes down to expectations. I’ve had this standard set for myself for years that I have to be perfect: be the perfect person, the perfect daughter, the perfect friend, and of course, be the perfect artist. This has resulted in me not being satisfied with my own art most of the time. When I draw, I get frustrated that the end result isn’t as perfect as I wanted it to be.
For those of you who aren’t as well-versed in the art scene: this is often called “art block.” There are times where I try to draw and I feel stuck and unsatisfied, so much so that I just have to close my sketchbook and take a day off. My expectations are up so high that nothing I create feels good enough.
Now, the next question: What can I do to stop this?
Well, there’s always taking an example of what you’ve done in the past. Personally, the most effective way to break my art block is to look at old art from weeks, months, years ago. Seeing new techniques I’ve learned over the years and how I’ve improved always inspires me to improve even more.
I’ve seen even the largest, most successful artists feel like they aren’t creating art that’s up to par. Artists that I’ve followed for years on social media have taken breaks to really hone in on their craft and come back stronger than ever. So I like to try and take a page from their book, and eventually, I can get back on my feet.
But how should I apply this to my future?
The rest of my time at RIT?
My future careers?
Well, the only way to succeed is to try. If I practice enough, but also give myself time to reflect and take a break when needed, I believe that I’ll be able to make art that feels right and that I can be proud of.
Because for me, art is all about a demonstration of what I can do, and how I can make an impact on the world.
One day, that impact will be made, and I will be proud of what I did to get there.