Although I am a firm believer in always finding time in your day, or week, to be thankful for certain aspects of your life, this time of year makes the idea of giving thanks and feeling thankful that much more important. Some wonder why a fancy dinner with special food suddenly changes people and makes them feel some type of way towards their friends and family. I also believe that I am who I am today because of all of the people that I have so much love for, whether they are new to my life or have always been there. I have had some very influential people in my life and I am going to explain just a few reasons as to why I am thankful for them.
My Grandfather
As I approached the life changing decision of college and where I was going to spend the next four years, he broke the college experience down into what each year meant and these were his exact words. “They scare the hell out of you in your freshman year by putting stuff on the test not discussed in class. When in reality they’re trying to make you focus on the research stuff that they want you to discover. The second and third year they work you to death. These are the years where you learn what you need in your chosen field. The last year they bore you to death because, they want you to say you had fun at (camp) and they don’t want you to forget them. You can do it” (In our discussions about college, I had asked that my family refer to it as camp if you got a little confused reading that apart). While this message may have been a little silly and maybe not exactly the way everyone thinks of their college experience, his advice came just when I needed it the most. He was able to break something down that seemed so big and daunting into smaller, bite size pieces so that I was able to understand the larger picture.
My Grandmother
I think what I appreciate about my grandparents most is their ability to give me a hug and tell me that it’s going to be okay when I need it most, but also give me a kick in the butt when I need it. After struggling with my family being so far away and calling them an insane amount of times the first few weeks, I finally decided that if I didn’t want to keep hearing the same thing, I needed to call some different people. I remember one day I called my grandparents and was explaining to them why I was sad. After their initial reaction and much needed inspirational messages and wisdom, my grandmother finally took the phone. She began to explain how, when she was going to college, there weren’t nearly as many options as I had to chose from. “You either went to college if your parents could afford it or you didn’t go. I went and there was one school for me to choose from. So guess what? I chose that school and went and started my life.” The point of her words were to remind me how lucky I was to have the opportunity to be where I was and have the support that I did. After incessant complaining, this was exactly what I needed to hear and to be reminded of, how important it is and lucky I was to have the opportunity to spend the next four years at Rhodes.
My Mother and Stepmother
This is a power-duo if I’ve ever seen one. The first three weeks of college were rough for them. I called both of them almost everyday, having identical conversations and receiving identical answers. Looking back, they were right. This whole college thing was just going to take some time to adjust to and everything was going to be okay. When it comes to advice, they are pretty much the best in the game. I’m thankful for them every day whether I voice it to them or not. They have grown with me and watched me make my mistakes, despite them telling me to do the exact opposite of what I did. If I had to choose one piece of advice that they have given me to pass on, it would be this: “ Find you, and go do that”. In many different ways and word choices, both my mother and step mother have stressed how important it is not to lose sight of finding my own happiness and understand that that is what life is really about. Everything else just blends into the background.
Grandma Mo
I think the biggest lesson my late grandmother taught me was to be kind. Thankfully, I was able to observe her and learn from the best. Any gifts, postcards or family pictures you ever gave to this woman, you could bet that she found the perfect place for it to be in her house. The fridge was covered with cards, thank-you notes and pictures of her friends and family. She could tell you who exactly was in every photo, what they were doing, and what they meant to her. Her kindness was plastered all over the walls of her home and illustrated through the steady stream of visitors she always had. She taught me to just be kind to everyone and it is as simple as that. Life is too short to hold grudges and to be unhappy. This sounds cliche but if anyone had known how incredibly nice and selfless my grandmother was, they would understand why this was such an important value and lesson coming from her.
Despite the bad days and the sad days, it becomes important for me to remind myself how truly lucky I am to have had the people listed above in my life. Each of them has taken their time in teaching me important life lessons so I can use moments like this to reflect on how thankful I am for each and every one of them. This is also my attempt at reminding everyone that while thanksgiving is around the corner, be thankful for your family all the time and don’t wait for a nice home cooked meal to tell them. Send a text, or call them and remind them how beyond lucky you are for their presence in your life.