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RHODES STUDENTS SHOCKED THAT CAMPUS SAFETY HAS THE AUDACITY TO ENFORCE PARKING REGULATIONS

Even since the birth of the modern car in 1886, Campus Safety has never felt inclined to enforce normal traffic laws on the Rhodes College campus.  As the college was founded in 1848, years before the mass production of the modern car began, on-campus traffic rules weren’t even needed for another 100 years.  It wasn’t until recently that Campus Safety decided to enforce parking rules, confusing many students on campus who are used to parking in handicapped spaces.  “It was a much simpler time when I attended Rhodes.” one alumni (class of 1890) states.  “Nobody could afford a car in the 1890s, so traffic regulations on campus were never needed.  I am disappointed that Rhodes has decided to throw such a curve ball at the students by enforcing parking rules.  How can Campus Safety expect Rhodes students to adapt?”.  Another alumni, who graduated around the same year as your mom, states, “I miss the Rhodes I used to love.  Rhodes has always been recognized as an exceptional school for many reasons, but we were most importantly recognized for our ability to avoid parking spots and for parking on random curbs around campus.  What a simpler time.”  Current students feel that they can no longer trust the administration. “A lot of students, including myself, believe that the administration has gone behind our backs by enforcing parking rules,”  claims a male “student” who has been seen lurking around the campus for the last six years.  Other students feel too upset to comment on the issue and continue to ignore the recently enforced parking rules in retaliation.

Note: The persons interviewed for this article are fictional and may or may not be based off of real people.

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