As I head towards my last month here in Kingston, moments seeped in solitude have been spent in reflection. This deep introspection has allowed me to contemplate what I’ve learned in the last four years, leaving me with a wealth of knowledge on how to make the remaining time exceptional. I can’t help but think…how extraordinary would it be if each day left here felt like an episode of an epic TV show in its final season? At the very least, that’s my goal.
With that, my recipe for finding fulfillment here in university, and in life in general, involves one that feeds the soul through fear and friends. I think the secret ingredient to achieving happiness in my last semester of university is a blend of good company and discomfort. I’ve learned that you must strive for both in order to get the most out of your time here. The marriage of these two beautiful things balance each other out. They make for the “pièce de résistance”, wholly completing your experience here and beyond. Let me convince you why this is true.
Firstly, allow me to touch on fear. If you’re one of my loyal readers, you know that I frequently advocate for the pursuit of fear and the quest for discomfort. I wholeheartedly believe that change is necessary, and one can only grow by experiencing a certain degree of uneasiness. This discomfort can take many unique forms, distinct to you and your individual human experience. However, irrespective of the clothes it wears, this harshness of uncertainty encourages challenging conditions. In embracing the discomfort, something beautiful is born: resilience, learning and personal expansion. In facing these trials, one can face the true nature of who they are, allowing for exponential personal growth and acceleration towards a higher version of oneself.
Not only as university students, but as human beings, I believe we must honour these true versions of ourselves by chasing this discomfort. Plus, what better environment is there than a university campus to seek out change and discomfort? University is an incubation period where we’re meant to grow and be faced with challenges. We’ve already made it this far into this chapter — one that scared us so profoundly as we entered it. To think, we once shuddered at the thought of embarking on this university journey. This place that we now call our second home, was once a mere idea. Now, we’re safe, protected and supported in nearly every respect — through our community, our teachers and peers, our friends. What better time to take a daily leap of faith and find out who you are than right now? You’ve taken the first step in just being here. Take the second.
Now, you’re probably thinking: I’m stuck in such a routine here already and exams are around the corner, how am I supposed to seek discomfort? Well, if you’re in this boat, you’ve come to the right place. Allow me to share some of the ways I’ve recently challenged myself and reaped the rewards of these personal thrill-seeking endeavours. A physical discomfort has been cold plunging in the lake. Beyond the physical pain of this undertaking, in harnessing the power of meditation and strengthening my mental endurance, I’ve also known mental discomfort. Also, I’ve recently been actively practicing being truly honest with others and myself, serving as a source of emotional discomfort. In accepting myself for who I am and jumping into the depths of my character, I’ve known fear. Lastly, a spiritual pursuit entails me saying yes to a far-off, foreign opportunity. In embracing uncertainty and the unknown, but ultimately trusting my progress, I’ve known incertitude and I will know difficulty. Once the fear dissolves and the dust settles, all that’s left is your truest self…and I can guarantee that you, in your purest form, are worth meeting.
Now, moving onto friends. For those that know me personally, you’d all agree that I’m an extremely grateful person. To my true friends, my only hope is that I’ve successfully expressed how deeply thankful I am for you all. Words feel futile when I begin to describe how grateful I am for my friends. Nevertheless, the gift of true friendship can only be coveted and cherished by all those lucky enough to experience it. If you’re a fortunate soul, these sentiments will ring true for you. I believe that finding such individuals is an act of luck or fate. Yet, keeping these relationships is no such thing.
Oftentimes in our busy lives here, we may lose touch with some true friends, which is the nature of university life. But regardless, our reality here requires work and there is no effort more worthy and deserving than the labour of friendship. Having and preserving good company in these last four years has changed the course of my life. Learning from the extraordinary individuals that surround me, that ground me, has been the greatest blessing. They go beyond people to split groceries with, or people to celebrate life with. They’re people to exist with, simply and plainly. Special people that make your heart dance and your soul sing. An immaterial home where you feel accepted, in your truest, rawest form. Despite the woes that may plague your university life, having a true friend is the greatest remedy.
The fusion of fear and friends goes beyond what you may initially think when envisioning the two together. Having friends to chase fear with is the recipe’s first instruction. Though after that, the rest is up to you. These moments are malleable to the people we surround ourselves with and the environment we choose to stand in. The fear and discomfort we pursue will take on different forms as we change as people, and as the people around us change as well. The discomfort you seek may be different to that of your best friend, but I believe it’s more about how we support each other in these moments of fear that make for the sweetest flavour for the soul. Moments of support enveloped in kindness and compassion for your neighbour. There is no greater pleasure than to be submerged in discomfort alongside a true friend, and to bear the fruits of your labour together.
By understanding the importance of friends and fear as food for the soul, you can go forward savouring the last bite of this meal. I encourage you to appreciate the special friends you’ve made in this chapter of life. I implore you to celebrate the opportunity that fear brings. I embolden you to take the first step today and tango with these extraordinary things. May the aftertaste to this glorious, redeeming meal be everlasting.