In order to have a healthy adult relationship, you must spend a significant amount of time by yourself. Discovering who you are on your own terms, figuring out what you like, what you dislike, what you love, and what you hate. At the end of each day, you have yourself. You should feel so comfortable by yourself that having other people around isn’t a constant necessity to have fun, because you are your own source of entertainment.
Only then, will you truly come to find someone who enhances your already amazing life. Life is complicated enough. In your 20’s you feel like you need to have everything together. School, work, your finances, friendships, relationships, you name it. You start to think about these things as you get older. But we all skip the very first step; working on your relationship with yourself.
If you’re lonely when you’re single, you are not ready for a relationship. It will fail every time. If you are not fully content with being alone, how are you going to try and let another person fill that void? It’s impossible. It leads to miscommunication, resentment, over dependency, lack of trust, etc.
If you can get to a place in your life where you enjoy your singleness, and you truly embrace it, you can go on to have really great and healthy relationships with other people. It’s never too late to take the time to learn more about yourself.
You should invest the majority of your time and energy into yourself. This is not only beneficial to you, but to everyone in your life as well. When you become your own best friend, you will attract others who are also comfortable with being alone. Relationships built from this foundation are much more meaningful.
Start doing things for yourself and by yourself; enjoy your alone time. Try to learn something from each of the relationships in your life, start thinking of the things you really like and don’t like at all. Building a relationship with yourself opens up so many doors for the future.