Girl Crush is a term used by women when they have a “crush” on another woman. It usually just implies an aesthetic or platonic attraction to another women, but not a sexual one. If you’re confused about attraction, then you can refer to the image below. Also know that there are probably other forms of attraction, and that everyone interprets attraction in their own way. That’s all totally fine, but in this day and age – question your attractions, especially if you have a girl crush.
Who knows? Maybe that aesthetic attraction is actually a sexual attraction to that girl crush of yours. Obviously, I don’t want to imply that you don’t know your own feelings. Chances are you probably know whether you would ever want to pursue some type of non-platonic relationship with someone of the same gender.
However, in this society, heteronormativity is all around us and conditions us to believe heterosexaulity is the norm or the standard. More and more people come out every year, saying that they aren’t entirely straight. I’m writing this to tell you that it may be possible that you’ve reduced your attraction to a “silly girl crush,” because you’ve been influenced by the heteronormativity that traditional society pushes on us. It’s fine if you are completely straight, or even if you aren’t entirely straight but you don’t want to pursue non-hetero relations. All I’m saying is, if your attraction to your girl crush could be more than aesthetic and platonic, then that is perfectly okay.
So let’s say you are curious about your girl crush. Now what? There are many ways to explore your attraction. A friend of mine went to a strip club one time, and that’s when she concluded she definitely was not sexually attracted to women. She appreciated their bodies, but was not interested in being sexual with them. Obviously you don’t have to go to a strip club, but it is an option. Here are a few more options to explore your attraction
1. Pornography
Unfortunately, pornography can be extremely problematic in the way it portrays women, but if you aren’t ready to approach a girl you’re interested in, then porn can help you. Just know, a lot of lesbian porn isn’t realistic, which is why numerous tumblr and twitter accounts that post lesbian porn are a better option, because it shows beautiful women without resorting them to sexual objects, especially for girls who are exploring for this first time. Pornography goes hand in hand with masturbation (no pun intended), and so if you end up digging the porn you’re looking at, then no shame in masturbation, and no shame in not masturbating either
2. Tinder
You can change your search query on tinder to only women if you want, and this is a good way to see if you might be romantically attracted to a girl. Obviously, the first thing you see on tinder is a picture of them, but if you click on their profile you can see what they’re interested in. You might end up wanting to go get coffee with them or something else along those lines. Also, on tinder, you can be pretty honest in what your intentions are.
3. Dating
So dating is interpretable, but along the lines of tinder, you can get to know people by dating. Through dating, you can explore your attractions in different ways too. Some girls are fine with just wanting to get sexual, and some you can see if you can be romantically attracted to. Go on a date, and if it doesn’t work out that’s fine.
Explore your sexuality in safe, consensual ways, if you want to. It’s totally okay and totally normal. It’s important to realize the different types of attractions. Maybe you’re sexually attracted to only men but romantically attracted to all genders. There are many diverse ways you can be attracted to diverse people. Welcome to the world of fluidity.
So, think about your girl crush. Is it just a crush? Maybe it’s more? Either way, just know that exploring your attractions is perfectly acceptable, and the most important part about sexuality is being consensual and safe without any pressure. If you want to pursue discovering who you’re attracted to, there are many ways to do this and many resources to help you if you need it. It doesn’t matter who you are attracted to, what matters is that you are your own person!