Happy birthday to me! While I have enjoyed celebrating my birthday, I decided to look back on my 21 years and acknowledge everything I’ve learned up to this point. Here are 21 thing I’ve learned at 21.
1. don’t take everything so seriously
This is something I wish I learned a while ago. You don’t have to take everything so seriously. Sometimes, you have to let go of your tight grip on life and let life happen around you. Just try to go to the flow as much as you can.
2. be vulnerable
I don’t know who made it a bad thing to be vulnerable. Being vulnerable is one of the best things you can do to yourself. It lets you express your emotions more readily, which can help you feel less stressed out. Vulnerability also can help you become closer with your friends, and will allow people to know who you are more intimately.
3. a friend to all is a friend to none
“A friend to all is a friend to none” is one of my favorite Taylor Swift lyrics. This just means you do not need a million friends to make you happy. You only need a small group of reliable people who you can feel completely yourself with and that group is going to be your forever friends. But, if you want a large group of friends, absolutely go for it.
4. take more walks outside
I wish I knew how much good a walk outside could do *before* the pandemic. I think you should aim to walk outside everyday. It really is the best way to center yourself and reflect on what is going on in your life.
5. call your family
Self explanatory. Call your family. You don’t know how much time you have with them, so make it count.
6. not everyone has to like you
This one is the hardest to hear. I have put so much effort into making sure everyone likes me. I don’t know how I could put this expectation on myself, when I don’t even like everyone. Just remember that, and it will make it so much easier to accept that not everyone has to like you.
7. fake tanning is very important
I seriously think a fake tan can fix anything. If you are pale like me, a fake tan can boost your confidence in such a major way, it’s unbelievable. My go-to product is the St. Tropez express tan.
8. go to therapy
Going to therapy is just something everyone should try. It is so nice to be given the opportunity to stop and learn how to improve yourself. It may not be for everyone, but at least try it out. I fully recommend it and it has helped me so much to work out issues with my relationships and help myself out.
9. travel as much as you can
It is so important to see the world. I have traveled to twenty five of the fifty states, and doing that road trip was the best experience of my life. It is so important to learn about other cultures and have new journeys. Travel with your friends. Travel with your family. Travel by yourself. Just get out and see it all.
10. being single is fun
Being in love is a really beautiful thing. However, being single is also a beautiful thing. You can spend more time with your friends and really get to learn about yourself and your identity. If you do suddenly find yourself single, cherish it until you are ready to try dating again. It is worth it.
11. you need a pair of air forces Ones
They are staple shoes. You need a pair for the rest of your life. They are the epitome of style and practicality. Although they are a bit pricey, they are well worth the investment.
12. get involved in college
At Penn State, I am in a sorority, HerCampus and the Health Policy and Administration club. Getting involved at school is the best thing you can do. I have met my best friends in these organizations and it is so important to have a sense of community.
13. self-awareness is a must
Self-awareness is so important. You need to know you aren’t always the victim and have an understanding of how your actions impact others. Self-awareness is an important tool that can make you a more well-rounded individual.
14. moving on takes time
Sometimes, moving on takes way more time than you want it to and that’s okay. Healing is not linear and it is important to constantly work on improving yourself. Try not to compare your progress to other people around you.
16. love what you do
You have your whole life to work, which is really scary. You should love what you do. Take your time to find a career you find fulfilling and fun. This will help you find a sense of purpose and can help you plan out the rest of your life.
16. put down the phones sometimes
Whenever I complained about stress, my mom always said “it’s because you are always on your phone.” Now, I hate to admit she’s right. Social media does cause stress and impacts your self confidence. It is okay to take a social media break every once in a while.
17. dress up every once in a while
Dress up like the baddie you are. Being comfortable is ideal for me, but I find it beneficial to try to dress up at least once a week. It can help boost my confidence and make me feel more ready to take on the world.
18. try yoga
Yoga is the best exercise for your mind and spirit. Stretching out and centering yourself is the best feeling in the whole world. At Penn State, they always have classes at the IM building, so I would highly recommend trying one out.
19. you have your whole life to be old, so live while you’re young
I’ve learned that it’s so important to enjoy my youth. These years go by so fast and no one wants to look back on youth with regrets.
20. be politically aware
It is so important to be aware of what is going on in the world. I’ve learned that am one of the most sheltered and privileged people in the world. You need to be aware of this, and strive to learn more about other communities and how you can work to make the world a better place.
21. have as much fun as you can
Molly, you are 21. You have come so far. Now, it’s time to have some fun. Party hard.