For all my current classmates and soon-to-be Staters, here are 10 important lessons to keep in mind as you move forward in your college careers.
1. Don’t wait for the weekends
Since we first start school, we are trained to believe that weekends are good and weekdays are bad; that it’s not possible to go up on a Tuesday, and looking forward to a Monday just doesn’t make sense. This misconception sticks with us when we get to college, and even with our weekends being extended into Thursday night, we still spend Monday through Wednesday counting the minutes until we can have fun again. What you’ll realize when you reach your final days of college is that every day is an opportunity to make memories you will never forget. You will cherish every waking moment you have left, and the earlier you start to appreciate all the moments you have in Happy Valley, the better off you’ll be.
2. Don’t spend your classes online shopping
With college being the first time we’re given the freedom to have our laptops out without teachers peering over our shoulders every other minute, the temptation of straying from the course material is very strong sometimes. As enticing as it is, always remember what you’re there for. You dragged your butt to class for a reason, and it wasn’t to see what sales were on Tobi.com. There will be days when a lecture is just too boring to bear, or your need for a formal dress far surpasses the importance of organic chemistry, but, for most days, try your best to stay engaged. Many of the professors here are brilliant people, and what they have to say will actually benefit you if you give them the time of day.
3. Never say no to the Creamery
With the threat of the freshman 15 and the skimpy going out outfits, maintaining a positive body image can be a serious challenge for a large majority of college women. We’re constantly comparing ourselves to others and being exposed to “perfect” bodies in the media on the daily, which can cause serious issues for our self-esteems. This struggle can lead many of us to believing that the massive amounts of delicious food available to us both on and off campus are actually evil sources that will ensure we can never wear crop tops again. Don’t fall into this trap. Yes, your body is changing, and yes, you’re probably going to gain some weight, but when it’s all said and done, you’re going to wish you got that heaping cone of Peachy Paterno. Accept the fact that you’re going to be a happier person by indulging in the foods you love and enjoying them with friends than you would be squeezing into that bodycon dress. Believe me, it’s not worth it.
4. Don’t waste your nights waiting for the text back
It’s going to happen to most of you more than once during your college careers. You’ll meet a guy, do a little flirting, exchange numbers and maybe even hang out a time or two. The next weekend will roll around, you’ll put on your hottest outfit, head out to a party with some friends and send the, “What are you doing tonight?” text. And you won’t get a response. It’ll suck, you’ll get frustrated, check his Snapchat every two minutes and think of all the reasons that could explain why he’s not responding. When you start to contemplate heading home and giving up on the night altogether, don’t. Put the phone down, go party with your friends, and don’t let one unreliable person determine your mood for the night. It’s easier said then done, but if you remind yourself who really matters, you’ll quickly understand how to handle the situation.
5. Don’t get mad at your friends for not going out when you want to
Unlike high school, you will probably never be on the same schedule as your friends on any given day. You’ll have different classes, get involved in different organizations and take on different responsibilities. Some of you will have more free time than others, and you’ll choose to spend that time going out. While this is perfectly acceptable, your friend might not be able to do the same every time you want to. As much as we’d all like to drop everything to spend the night out, it’s not always possible. Be understanding of one another’s schedules, and appreciate the times you do have together. Always ask, and never assume that just because a person doesn’t go out very often that they’re never going to. Keep encouraging them, but never get mad if they say no. It’s a silly thing to fight about.
6. Don’t spend college trying to find your Penn State husband
Many of us have that dream of finding the perfect PSU boy to settle down with, raising a Penn State family, coming to the tailgates and dressing all our babies in Nittany Lion onesies. Though some of us may very well end up marrying a man we met in Happy Valley, it is by no means a requirement and should not be the focus of our college careers. We came to learn, get a degree and have a great time while doing it. We have enough to worry about during these four years, and filling our minds with thoughts of marriage is simply a waste of time. Focus on finding a job for the future, and if a boy comes along during the process, then so be it.
7. Spend time with your friends even when you feel like you’re too busy
This will be a lot easier for some people than others. For those of us who choose to get involved in a number of different things or have ridiculous amounts of schoolwork, it’s easy to put our friendships on the back burner. We know our friends are more forgiving than our professors, and we take advantage of the fact that they’ll always be there. Sadly, what you’ll realize when you’re near the end is that they won’t be. Sure, you’ll always be friends and keep in touch, but the chances of you ending up in the same place after graduation are slim to none. No longer will they be within walking distance and hanging out will require a lot more travel and planning. No more wine nights, late night talks or family dinners. It’s very hard to accept and not something you will look forward to so appreciate the fact that they are with you now and make time for them while you can.
8. Don’t overwhelm yourself with extracurriculars
With things like the involvement fair and pressure from advisors and professors, many of you will feel like you have to get involved in a billion different things in order to be successful during your first few years of college. You’ll think the longer the list, the better, and anything you can add to your resume is worth exploring. Take it from me; just cool it. Don’t sign up for every organization under the sun, don’t try to have meetings every night and don’t get involved with something only because you think it’ll make you look good. When you’re deciding on what you want to be a part of, look for the things that you honestly enjoy. Pick a few, and put your all into those organizations. Having a few select extracurriculars that you are super passionate about and dedicated to is just as beneficial, if not, more, than having a ton that you’re just a member of. Clubs and organizations are very beneficial for many students, but they shouldn’t take up all of your free time.
9. Keep an open mind
College is all about new experiences. You’re going to do things that you’ve never done before with people you’ve never met, and it’s going to be weird at first. Embrace the strangeness, and keep an open mind in every situation. Forget the stereotypes about minorities, the LGBQT community and Greek life. Get to know each person for who they really are and approach each new encounter with curiosity and kindness.
10. Strive for balance, not perfection
If there’s one piece of advice I would give to college women, it’s this one right here. It’s a battle I’ve dealt with personally and the most important lesson I’ve learned over my four years. Living on your own and having complete control over your life for the first time can cause those of you who are perfectionists to strive to be the best you can be in every aspect of life. You want perfect grades, perfect relationships and perfect health, and anything less is simply unacceptable. You push yourself to put in a full day’s work and don’t allow time for yourself because you’d rather give it to others. As much as you feel you are leading a fulfilling life, eventually it catches up with you, and you realize you aren’t making the most of your college experience. Don’t worry about the test you failed, skip the gym when there are more important things to do, and put as much effort into making yourself happy as you do into your work. There’s nothing wrong with being a hard worker, but always make sure you’re making time to enjoy these four years. As they always say, they’ll be gone before you know it.