Keeping long-distance relationship is difficult in the first place; adding a college life from both parties can make it seem unattainable. Many couples in long-distance relationships have been told by non-believers, “don’t get your hopes up,” or “the distance will get to you; your feelings will eventually fizzle out.” However, the success of a long-distance relationship relies on what each person is willing to do to keep it alive. While this sounds easier said than done in the midst of classes, projects, studying, work and a social life, there are three important steps you can take in order to balance a long-distance relationship in college:
1.) Communicate
While this is the most important method in keeping any relationship healthy, it plays an especially large role in fueling the success of a long-distance relationship. Using Skype or FaceTime when available will be important for face-to-face communication, but when you’re both super busy with studying and classes, sending a sweet text message or quirky SnapChat to wish them a good day will reassure your significant other that you haven’t forgot about them. There will be days when you simply won’t have time to chat face-to-face, but keeping up with text messages in-between classes or on your break at work will keep the communication ties strong and will provide a good balance for you both. Most importantly when you talk to your significant other, be sure to write down each other’s schedules so you will know when will be a good time to talk. Also, never be afraid to voice any concerns you may have with the relationship. Long-distance can be intimidating, but if you just talk things over with your partner, you will be able to discuss what works for the both of you. Your partner may be having the same concerns but has been too afraid to voice them, so bringing those concerns up may make you both worry less about making the relationship work. Good communication is key in every relationship!
2.) Send Thoughtful Gifts
Everybody loves receiving mail! Sending a small care package or letter to your significant other every so often will brighten their day and let them know they are on your mind. You obviously don’t have to go out of your way to purchase extravagant gifts, but little knick knacks such as postcards, candy, small stuffed animals, or something with your school’s name on it will do the trick! Most college bookstores have these items, so you won’t have to walk far to find them. This will keep your relationship strong by reminding your partner that they are appreciated and being thought about even on your busiest of days.
3.) Plan A Visit
There are several opportunities to visit your partner or have them visit you! Between Christmas break, Spring break, and Summer break, there is surely a way to work out a trip for the both of you. Planning when you’re going to see each other ahead of time is important so that you can save money, buy plane tickets if needed, and also work your time with family in too. Depending on how long your breaks are, figure out how many days will be appropriate to spend together, and then spend the remaining days with your family. That will give you a good balance by designating time with your partner and family to avoid conflict. During the summer, your plans can be a little more flexible because of the length of summer break. Plan on saving money to go on a cross-country trip, or stay close to home and enjoy your time together. Any time spent together is valuable!
Long-distance relationships can be challenging. There will undoubtedly be hard times, but with compassion, understanding, dedication, love, and good communication, your relationship can be among the many successful ones! As said by the legendary architect Frank Lloyd Wright, “you have to go wholeheartedly into anything in order to achieve anything worth having.”