I was a die-hard fan of The Mindy Project. I ran a fan blog for which I consistently made semi-popular fan-art paintings. Even when I could tell that the story was poorly organized and had no continuity, I defended it. There was, however, something that I let slide for a long time that has now permanently alienated me as a viewer: jokes about sexual violence.
So, as an activist against gendered violence, in order to be open about the depth of my knowledge and passion about the subject, I always out myself as a survivor. This is not something unique or special, but is in fact the reality for over a third of women, which is why I think it is so incredibly crucial for a television show that clearly appeals to young and middle-age women to be respectful to the experience of probably a large portion of its audience. Although this is important for all media, in this case, the writers and producers are actually just losing consumers because of their thoughtless choices.
Below is a comprehensive list of episodes that made me lose faith in what used to be my favorite show:
Season 2, Episode 2. “The Other Dr. L”:
Danny’s completely sober ex-wife sleeps with an obviously blacked-out drunk Dr. Leotard (James Franco) in an attempt at revenge. This is not addressed anywhere in the season.
Season 2, Episode 12. “Danny Castellano Is My Personal Trainer”:
Danny and Mindy see each other naked accidentally and, in the process, get hurt. While in the hospital, Mindy demands that Danny, a religious Catholic, repress the memory of her naked body like he repressed being molested by a priest as a child.
Season 2, Episode 22. ”Danny and Mindy”:
Danny enters the women’s bathroom in order to try to win Mindy back. She doesn’t want to talk to him there, so she calls him a “rapist.”
Season 3, Episode 2. “Annette Castellano Is My Nemesis”:
Annette is worried that her son, Danny, has revealed the layout of her house to someone who will “elder-rape” her. This is fine for a story-line if handled with respect, however, later, when Dr. Lahiri is clearly trying to re-set Annette’s joint, Annette cries, “Elder rape!” While I acknowledge that this is not overtly making light of the issue, the final example is not debatable.
Season 3, Episode 4. “I Slipped”:
Embarrassingly, I still accepted and looked forward to TMP until this episode, granted with a grain of salt. But this installment (aired October 7th) was the final straw. You won’t believe me until you see it, but this episode centers around letting go of consent every once in a while. The title refers to Danny telling Mindy that he “slipped” and performed anal on her. Which, you know, it happens; communication is difficult in the bedroom for some folks. But, because she doesn’t really want it, she asks a nurse to prescribe her Rohypnol, or “roofies,” the most popular date rape drug, so that she will be able to feel loosey-goosey about doing something sexual with her partner that she doesn’t want to do. Excuse me? Consent is something ongoing and, if your ability to be cognizant changes, ie. with drugs, your ability to continue giving consent and choosing your actions or acts performed on you decreases or ceases. This is sexual violence and it was broadcasted with a positive, silly connotation, on television. You don’t have to be scarred by what happened on screen in order to recognize the negative effects of playing off violence as “couple’s issues.”
Why? Because violence is always played down as petty couple’s issues.
It is not and will never be “edgy” to joke about rape, molestation, battery, or sexual assault in a world that already invalidates the victims of these crimes with blame and misunderstanding. Mindy Kaling, the editors, the writers, whoever else had a say in this – you got it so wrong.