Long Distance relationships are hard enough as it is, especially in college, but preserving one with a guy who plays sports seems nearly impossible. Ever heard of the “turkey dump?” It’s the saying that most high school students going into their freshman year of college, with a long distance relationship, usually end up breaking up before Thanksgiving. Hey, if the relationship doesn’t work, don’t sweat it, but if you find yourself trying to maintain an LDR with an athlete, there are definitely some tips to keep in mind.
There are all sorts of types of these relationships. Depending on the sport your boyfriend plays, the season it is in, the commitment he has to the sport, and many other factors, your relationship could be an absolute roller coaster. I talked to a couple of Pitt girls to find out the biggest setbacks and triumphs of dating a college athlete, long distance style. Here are some tips and food for thought for LDRs:
1. Be accepting of his schedule
No one wants to come second to something inanimate, whether it’s a sport or a hobby in general, but when in a relationship with an athlete, this is a must. Obviously your significant other has invested a lot of time in the sport that he is playing to be able to play at a collegiate level. Between lifts, conditioning, and practice, texting you is probably not his number one priority. I know that sounds harsh, but your guy has to maintain his grades and his spot on the field! Set a time each day or every other day for the two of you to talk on the phone or Facetime (even better) so that you still feel connected even though you’re both extremely busy.
2. Ask about his practices, games, coach, teammates etc.
When the time comes that you can have a meaningful conversation, ask about how things are with him. Make sure that he knows you are interested in what he is doing, even though you are however many miles away.
3. Watch games online, or better yet, VISIT!
There’s nothing sexier than seeing your boyfriend kill it out on the field, so go watch his games, if possible. Getting to show you off to all of his friends and having you watch him play will make you feel even more connected. Talk to his friends and make sure they get a good impression so they know you’re not just some random girl that your boyfriend talks about.
4. Pretend you’re an athlete–or at least look like it!
You know how in shape your bf is during the season, so make an effort to be in shape as well! This is your new motivation. Not only is he going to be looking hotter than ever, but you only get to see him every now and again. Make sure your body is something worth remembering while you’re apart.
5. Stop thinking you’re not good enough
Relax! It’s just as hard on your bf as it is on you, so don’t put extra pressure on the relationship by thinking you’re not good enough. He picked you for a reason! No matter what other athletes he’s hanging out with, he wouldn’t deal with the potential hardships of an LDR if he wasn’t all in.
6. Send him love
There’s no better feeling than getting an email saying that you have a package or even just getting a letter in the mail, so send your guy some love! This is where some creativity comes in handy. You can send him cookies, pull together a holiday care package, write him a love letter, or anything you can think of! It’ll let him know that you’re thinking about him even if you haven’t been able to be together as much as you want.
7. Let him know that you have a life too and it’s just as important
Sometimes it may feel like the spotlight is always on your guy because of his sport, but make sure everyone knows how great you are too. Whether you’re on student government board, in a sorority, play an intramural sport, or are very involved in your academics, make sure he knows it! Let him know that you want him to meet your college friends and be a part of your life just as much as you are in his. You have responsibilities and priorities just as much as he does, so don’t be left in the dark.
8. Remember why you’re with him
While he is dealing with all of the hype of being an athlete, you may feel lonely sometimes. You obviously have other guys at your school that are definitely tempting to hook up with. Even though you have these doubts, remember why you’re with your guy in the first place. Think about the times when you are together and tell yourself that a one night hook-up IS NOT worth it.
9. Don’t hold on to something that’s not there
All in all, LDRs are very hard. Some fail while others prosper. You’ll never know until you give it a try. So do your best and make the effort to make this relationship last! But if it fails, what can you do, you tried. Do what you feel is right.
Keeping all of these tips in perspective will make for a great long distance relationship, no matter how many miles apart you are. Even though sometimes it’s hard to keep them in mind, try your absolute best because, who knows, in the end it really could be worth it.