At the moment, I am the epitome of a female college student; sitting with my legs outstretched before me, study materials for my Portuguese exam strewn across my desk. Yet, naturally I have the latest magazine opened, obscuring my Portuguese homework. As I flip absent-mindedly through the pages, a title catches my eye: “How to Deal with Being Taller than the Average Woman”.
Having spent my life towering above the majority of the population, I excitedly begin reading but immediately feel my heart drop upon reading the first sentence: “At 5’11’, I tower above not only my friends, but my family, coworkers and boyfriend as well…” I immediately stop reading.
5’11’’?
My father’s side of the family is tall; my great-grandfather measured a staggering 6’10’’, my grandmother at 65 stands 6’, and my father is 6’4’’. My mother is 5’8’’, and my sister is a fun-sized 5’3’’. I on the other hand?
I stand at 6’3’’. Yes everyone, 6’3’’ and I am a nineteen-year-old girl. Laugh, gasp, whisper. I am used to it.
This summer a child gawked open-mouthed at me in the local grocery store and approached me with saucer-like dilated eyes and whispered, “Excuse me, are you a giant?” It took a lot of self-control to not shove a fistful of grapes into his mouth. Just the other day I went to the movie with my roommate who is 5’3’’, and two girls about five inches behind me whispered about how “huge” I was. Apparently they believe that because I am so far up, I can’t hear.
Am I huge? Not at all. Sure, statistically speaking the average woman in the United States is 5’4’’, but that number is slowly on the rise. What’s more, I’m not even American; I was born in the Czech Republic and the average height for a woman there is 5’8’’. Times are changing. So this is for my fellow tall girls who are insecure about being tall, because trust me, I used to be just like you.
A Tall Girls take on clothes:
One of the greatest challenges about being tall is finding cute clothes that don’t look like you wore them in fifth grade. I wear a size 28 jean with a 36’’-38’’ inseam and finding inexpensive, good quality jeans is damn near impossible. My go-to places for denim are Alloy and Urban Outfitters. Now, they are not the most inexpensive jeans out there, but they are truly the longest I have encountered. American Eagle, Hollister, Abercrombie? Forget it. Their ‘longs’ are as good as capris on me. Jeans from both Alloy and Urban are incredibly comfortable and long lasting. In fact, I am sitting cozied up in my 3-year-old jeans from Urban as we speak.
Us.longtallsally.com has great options for cheap, good quality leggings as well because I usually find that leggings are one of the hardest things to buy. For any type of shirt, whether it is long sleeved, short sleeved, tank top etc., it honestly is a hit or a miss. But always, always, always try it on. What may look very long on a hanger can hang incredibly awkwardly on your body. I can’t tell you how many times I have bought a t-shirt that looked long enough, only to have it fit so strangely that I just have to return it.
That being said, things that don’t appear long enough sometimes surprise you and drape on your body in amazing ways. Just because the line for the changing rooms is long, don’t skip trying it on all together. Trust me, you may regret it. Forever21 and H&M are starting to come out with longer selections for shirts (I’m still waiting for longer selections of pants though; come on, I’m a broke college student!)
One thing though girls, never be ashamed of the size you have to buy. Ever. I used to be embarrassed that I would have to buy a large when my 5’2’’ best friend would buy an extra small. Comparing two bodies that are so vastly different is not even an option. Everybody, whether tall, short, curvy, or skinny, is beautiful. Buying clothing that fits and accentuates your body ignoring the label – just enjoy the way that size 32 jeans make your butt look.
And tall girls, SHOW OFF SOME LEG! I’m not saying wear a shirt and call it a dress but come on, women wear heels to get legs that are as long as ours barefoot. So once in a while hike up the hemline and be prepared for the stream of compliments and stares you get.
Taking on the boys:
When I was in middle school my mom would tell me, “Adela, don’t worry, boys will grow in high school.” When I got to high school there were no boys taller than me, so she told me to wait for college.
When I got to college? I was still, for the most part, taller.
I asked my best guy friend for his honest opinion about statuesque women and this is his direct quote; “Guys just like girls that make them feel powerful. Boys like to be the dominant ones. And while you look like a model, boys don’t want someone that tall.” Needless to say we are no longer friends.
I’m kidding, but after seeing my face he promptly added that I would eventually find a super nice, tall guy.
I even did some research online and found this quote, which sums everything up; “However, a woman’s greater height becomes more of a liability during mate selection because height is often associated with strength and power. These are traditionally traits that are highly regarded in men but less so in women. A tall woman may therefore have an emasculating effect on a shorter man.”
So tall girls, here is my blurb to you: Do. Not. Settle. If you think that you will never find a guy who is taller than you, you are wrong. If a guy cannot get over the fact that you are taller than him, than just let him go and move on. Wait. I promise, I truly promise you will find someone who will appreciate ALL of you.
However, I know that a lot of you are probably going to not want to date someone shorter than you. If that is the case, you cannot be angry that a shorter guy doesn’t want to date you: you are doing the same to him that he does to you. However, do not let anyone make you feel bad wanting to only date taller men. You are not shallow because you won’t date someone shorter; you are not “self conscious” because you won’t date someone shorter. You just know what you want.
Men are generally intimidated. When a woman is tall and exudes confidence, men do not know how to approach her. It may seem right now that all boys go for are the cute, little, delicate girls. However, that will change. I can’t tell you when, I can’t tell you why, but I promise it will.
Rising above pestering people:
I swear on the life of my cat (and I never do that) that I hear a comment about my height at least once a day. Some sort of variation of “Wow, that girl is TALL!” or “How tall do you think she is?” or “That must suck,” or even the occasional “That is too damn tall for a girl”.
It used to bother me. I used to go home and scream at my dad for being the reason I am so tall. But I have since learned to shrug it off.
Society doesn’t know how to respond to things they are unfamiliar with.
I was born in the Czech Republic and people there are incredibly tall by American standards. I never get the comments, the stares, or the questions. Ever. Because it is the societal norm.
However here I feel as though it is pretty rare to see a teenage girl measuring 6’3’’. Don’t make anything of it. Most of the time, ignoring them is the best option. Although I have started to get so frustrated that if I hear someone whisper, “That girl is so tall,” I calmly walk up to him or her, smile and exclaim, “Yep, I’m 6’3’’”. They are often times so shocked that I approached them that they promptly apologize.
These blubbering buffoons are the reason that so many tall girls that I know, and even don’t know, suffer from a lack of the one thing that I believe everyone should have: self confidence.
All through middle school I would walk slouched over attempting to minimize my height. Now I walk with my back straight and my head held high, because who cares? If people want to judge me because of my height, let them.
Chances are girls are just jealous that they have to wear heels to make their legs as long as mine, and boys are jealous that I naturally can dunk a basketball (I am semi-joking). Unfortunately, judgment will never stop. We cannot control it. What we can control however, is how we respond to it.
My tallest girlfriend is 6’, while the rest of my friends hover around 5’5’’. When I walk with them I always stick out like a sore thumb, and my friends always ask me if I realize how many people stare as I walk by.
Girls. My fellow tall girls. You are beautiful. We are beautiful. When you enter a room, enter the room. Exude your confidence with a killer smile and have people stare at you because of the way you present yourself, not because of how tall you stand off the ground.
My friend Taylor is 6’. I asked her what she likes about being tall and she said, “I feel like people pay attention to you when you are taller, especially adults. I think they judge young people and treat them with less respect when they are shorter because height implies a certain sense of authority and power.”
That is so true. When a taller woman walks into a room, people stare because of the shift in the room. There is a sense of power with her as she walks.
Rebecca Thomas, a blogger for NYTimes who stands 6’4’’, noted this; “I have come to learn that my height can be used to my advantage. I’ll be graduating from college with a journalism degree soon, and when I stand up and ask a question, people listen.” <