Ladies, I think we can all agree that there are certain aspects of the college life that can be stressful. There’re our sometimes-strenuous class load, internships, sports we play, jobs we have and trying to maintain at least a somewhat-exciting social life. However, there is one thing that I believe potentially trumps all of these things: having a crazy roommate. Now, when I say crazy, I don’t mean forgot-to-do-the-dishes-for-a-week crazy. I mean certifiably insane.
For those of you collegiettes out there who have never had to experience the horror that is living with someone who infuriates you the second you walk through the door without even saying a word or seeing the person, I envy you. But through this experience I find myself wiser in dealing with people like this and I’ve come up with a few tips to follow in case this should ever happen to you:
Document EVERYTHING: When I say document everything, I literally mean EVERYTHING. Take pictures, save notes, lock text messages and emails, record something if you have to and take screen shots of nasty things she may put online about you. All of these things can be used to corroborate your story if you feel you need to take some kind of legal action, which, unrealistic as it may sound, happens all the time. It’s always better to be prepared in the long run. If you tell someone about the way you’re being treated, you need to have hard evidence or else someone is going to think it’s just an easily resolved roommate spat.
Stand your ground: This one should really be a no-brainer. We’re all strong-willed women, right? Right. You do not deserve to be treated unfairly for no reason, especially in your own home. However, trying to ignore the person’s actions or become a mediator of sorts will not get you anywhere. Sometimes, you just can’t reason with crazy. In light of that, not backing down to your instigator will help more than you think it will. It’ll gain you control of the situation and let your roommate know that you aren’t going to turn a blind eye to their behavior or back down to their treatment of you. Stick up for yourself! There’s never shame in that.
Inform your landlord: This step may seem like tattle telling, but it really isn’t. If you feel uncomfortable in your own home, someone needs to know and your landlord is a great starting point. Now, your landlord may not necessarily be able to do anything about the situation if it doesn’t directly involve destruction of the house or apartment itself, but he or she should be aware of what’s going on. This is especially helpful if the circumstances should grow worse and you feel you need to take legal action or you feel physically unsafe. Don’t go sit in the office and whine, but be professional, explain factually what’s going on, and tell your landlord you just wanted him or her to know. This will go a long way believe me.
Now, I realize that this is a short list, but I can promise that even if you just stick to these three steps, you will be ahead of the game. Obviously, I hope that no one actually has to take this advice, but it’s good to know that it’s there. It’s simply unacceptable to live in an uncomfortable and hostile situation, especially for the duration of a lease, which is usually a full year. Think about it this way, ladies: you pay just as much for rent and bills as your roommate—don’t let that person run you down! You have just as much right to feel safe in your own home and don’t forget it!
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