My eyelids jolt open at 5:00 a.m. I’m made keenly aware of the fact that I MUST go to the
bathroom, and I MUST go to the bathroom NOW. I untwist from my bed sheets and stumble to the
bathroom, where I proceed to just haaaang out in cruel half-naked agony for the next three and a half
hours; alternating between the toilet, the floor, the tub, and back to bed only to return to the bathroom again. At 8:30 I would slug my way to the health center, do my business in a cup, drop my pants for my favorite doctor, and receive an antibiotic which may or may not have turned my urine bright orange for the next week.
What terrible timing! It was week 8. I had an exam later that night (which I would fail), a flight
to Boise for a funeral the next day (from which I would return to Eugene bedraggled 17 hours later),
and had cranked out a paper the night before (for which I would receive a D). Yet here I was – 5:00 a.m., laid out on the bathroom floor, totally incapacitated, scrambling to hold myself together while also feverishly clutching my pants and muttering, “IT HURTS.”
After four years of battling recurrent urinary tract infections (UTIs), I have the routine down to
a pretty efficient science. Despite this, I have somehow been unsuccessful at preventing them. I know
the symptoms well; persistent pressure and bloated feeling all through my abdomen; searing, burning
sensation all through my urethral and vaginal openings; and shaky, achy pains in my entire body.
I have had a UTI roughly every one to four months since my sophomore year of college, the
worst of which resulted in me stranded alone, bursting into hysterical tears at a hospital in Maine
crying, “But you CAN’T be closed, I had an appointment!”
As you can imagine, I have tried just about everything there is under the sun: antibiotics (several kinds), cranberry juice, cranberry pills, vitamin C pills, vitamin D pills, calcium supplements,
multivitamins, all cotton underwear (I even wore granny panties for a week once), wiping front to back, peeing after sex and/or bike riding (not the same, I realize), numbing gels, baking soda flushes, you get the point. But sure enough, I seem to get them at an alarming frequency anyway. It’s really not a matter of if I get a UTI, but when. As such I have adapted several coping mechanisms, which I will share with you should you get one of these icky ailments.
*Keep in mind that I am no doctor. You should ALWAYS call your healthcare provider if you suspect
that you have a UTI. This is simply information gleaned from my own experience, which I share with you, woman-to-womankind.
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Basic UTI info:
– Urinary tract infections are caused from foreign bacteria entering the urethra, much like bacteria entering your eye and causing an infection. Even though urine is technically sterile, it can’t kill a lot of foreign bacteria, in particular E.Coli (yes, that E.Coli, which comes from the digestive tract and exits the body via fecal matter).
– Foreign bacteria can find its way into your urethra (located above your vaginal canal) a number of ways, but namely from…
– wiping from back-to-front after using the restroom
– too-tight underwear like thongs that rub back and forth over the urethra’s opening
– moist or damp fabric close to the body for extended amounts of time (swimmers and runners,
take heed!)
– bacteria transmitted through sexual activity (“honeymoon cystitis” is a common name for
UTI symptoms and can result from “foreign unclean objects” entering the vagina. Cough,
cough, gentlemen.)
– UTIs must be treated immediately to prevent further discomfort or damage
– Left unchecked, the bacteria will grow and spread through your urethra to your bladder
Before the Foulness
Eat lots of whole, healthy foods and supplement where necessary.
Ok, so eating at McDonalds or Panda Express every day is not going to give you a UTI. However, eating a diet that is full of whole wheat, unprocessed ingredients, fruits and veggies is going to make your immune system killer, which kills foreign bacteria. Additionally, if you are prone to UTIs, you really should consume a lot of vitamin C. Cranberries have been lauded as the cure-all for UTIs, and while they are extremely good for your urinary tract they can only help prevent UTIs, so chowing down on them instead of calling a doctor is not a good choice. Load up on your nutrients and see about adding a supplement if necessary to prevent UTIs before they happen.
Pump up your feel-good regiment
Tylenol, Advil, Aleve, Ibuprofen, whatever it is you take to make your fever break, I suggest you pop the recommended dosage at the first signs of a UTI. Sorry to go all Mom on you, but you will be ever so grateful if you are ever struck with one of these nasty infections (or a migraine, or cramps, etc.) and you have the luxury of reaching in your purse and accessing comfort.
Get the next available appointment
You need an appointment to go to the health center, and Urgent Care will cost you a very pretty penny, particularly if your insurance gets rejected, which it very likely will if you live out of state. While UTIs are time-sensitive, a same-day appointment for a UTI will work just as fine as an immediate appointment.
Some helpful tips post-appointment:
Take a bath
An almost-hot bath feels amazing once you adjust to the temperature. You can fill the tub to the brim, or as I prefer, fill the tub just a little bit and sprinkle in a ton of salt. I don’t really know why the salt helps, but a nice lady recommended it once and it doesn’t hurt at least. The water will help relax you and warm your aches.
Keep a Bottle Handy
No, not a bottle of booze. Every girl should have a bottle of witch hazel under her sink. While witch hazel does lots of really cool things, one of its best uses is that it can feel blissfully cool when applied to a cotton round and pressed against the urethra’s opening. If I’m home and feel a UTI coming on this is one of the first things I do. While it’s only surface comfort, it can be really nice.
Go Clear
Flush your system with a lot of clear, salty liquid. Watered-down cranberry juice, crackers
(the saltier the better) and some kind of broth-like soup are all helpful, too. Can’t handle drinking anymore water? Put a frozen strawberry in your water cup/bottle. I promise you will drink at least twice as much as you normally do, plus the strawberry is super delicious once it’s a little bit thawed!
UTIs can certainly derail your life for a little bit, but it doesn’t have to be totally ruinous. Follow these tips and start feeling better soon!
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Elisa Marcheschi is a recent alum from the University of Oregon, receiving her Bachelor of Art’s Degree in March 2012 in Sociology and a Minor in English. She was born and raised in Ogden, Utah, but is not Mormon (well, not anymore). She spent her early college years at Southern Utah University. Through the National Student Exchange, she went on exchange to the University of Oregon in 2009 and liked Eugene so much that she transferred to the school in 2010 and fulfilled the Oregon residency requirements in 2011. She has worked as a lifeguard and swim lesson teacher for eight years, a swim counselor at sleep away camps in Maine, and earned her American Association of Snowboard Instructors Level One certification at Brian Head Ski Resort, Utah. Her interests range from social reform through toxin awareness, education, transportation; energy education and activism; 20th-Century art culture; social media and technological advancement; theater arts; product design and consumer habits; whole foods and cuisine; tourism and outdoor travel/exploration; English as a Second Language, Sign Language, Early Childhood Education, Poetry, Haute Couture and costume design; contemporary art culture; french bulldogs; big windows and natural light; anything pasta or cheese based. Her car’s name is Gregory Deuce the Snowbeast. You can follow her on Twitter, Facebook, and Tumblr- @elisaiselectric