Although I’m not a true Christina Aguilera fan, whatsoever, I do believe she pointed out a major societal flaw and imbalance when she sang these lyrics:
“The guy gets all the glory the more he can score,
While the girl can do the same and yet you call her a whore.”
Song: Can’t Hold Us Down (feat. Lil’ Kim)
Women are often referred to as sluts, whores, skanks, and other derogatory terms for “daring” to express their sexuality.
“Good” girls should look sexy but not actually be sexual. They need to act aloof of any sexual play if they want to be labeled as “good” and avoid being deemed as slutty. Without a doubt, there is a major imbalance of power among the sexes.
Women are unfairly cornered into a submissive role, while men have obtained and have effectively preserved the dominant role and the power to label women “whores” if a woman should step out of the sexual bounds or limits.
The very act of labeling women based on their sexual history has been so prevalent and evident in our culture that scholars have coined this issue as the virgin/whore dichotomy.
The virgin/whore dichotomy essentially states that if a woman is thoughtful, innocent, and sexually uninterested, she is must therefore be good or virginal.
However, if a woman is interested in sex, dresses in a sexy way, or speaks candidly about topics referring to sexual play, for example, she is by default a whore.
Women and even young girls walk this bizarre tightrope and are perpetually in limbo of either being thought of as virginal or being categorized as a whore.
Unfortunately, the college culture is one of the best examples in which we may observe this virgin/whore dichotomy. If a college girl has several sexual partners during her college years, she may very easily be judged.
Meanwhile, one of her male peers is not necessarily given high fives as he walks around campus for his sexual conquests as we see on television or in films, but essentially no one even bats an eye when they hear how popular he has been with girls during his time in college.
It’s almost expected for college-aged boys to be free with their sexuality and curious about the opposite sex, yet on the opposite end of the spectrum, we have girls who have been unjustly told that they need to think long and seriously before throwing caution to the wind.
When was the last time you truly and seriously heard a guy being defined as a slut? And, when was the last time you heard a certain girl being defined as a slut?
Chances are you remember the instance in which a female was being labeled with a derogatory term rather than a male. Neither women nor men deserve these cruel titles.
One particular sex should not be more inclined to receive these descriptions yet that is the predicament we as women continue to inexplicably face.
To amend our culture, we must first begin the ripple effect by altering our own terminology and perspective. You don’t need to go on a two hour rant or longwinded explanation in front of strangers, but also don’t be timid about asserting yourself if you should so happen to hear a woman being slut-shamed.
You are not being a lunatic by emphasizing that slut-shaming is unreasonable. You’re just backing this crazy notion that women deserve to be treated better.
Is it not finally time to banish the slut-shaming attitude?
Shouldn’t we be embarrassed to speak this way by now?
It’s 2014.
This is an op-ed piece.